Cut jokes

What is the difference between an emo kid and a cutting board?

What's the difference between a depressed person and a pizza?

Pizza won't cut itself.

If you don’t like mowing your lawn, just get emo grass! It cuts itself!

What's flat chested and emo? A cutting board.

how do you cut of a hillbilly's dick?

kick his sister in the jaw

I started crying when my dad cut up onions.

Onions was such a good hamster.

Why was the depressed man happy in food-tech?

He got to cut himself.

How does the moon cut his hair?

Eclipse it!

I started crying when dad was cutting onions.

Onions was such a good dog.

What's the difference between a priest and a rabbi? A rabbi cuts it off, a priest sucks it off.

Miscarriage jokes aren't funny, just cut it out.

Mom: You will make me kill myself.

Me who has cut first: I'll kill myself ✨first✨!

Why can't emos work at a restaurant? Because they cut too much.

This emo kid wanted to join a group of emos, but he didn't make the cut.

I just planted emo grass.

Ignore it and it cuts itself.

Was invited to the inauguration of an I-pad.

We were all ready to begin the event. I was supposed to cut the ribbons, but before I could do that, Penaldo jumped outta nowhere and shouted, "I DON'T WANT I-PAD, I ONLY WANT TO STATPAD!"

Shame on Penaldo for ruining the event! 😡

I will remember my biker buddy's last words: "Why did you cut in front of me?"

I wish my grass were emo, so it would cut itself.

Why doesn't Helen Keller's kid have ears? She gave it its first haircut!

People say, "I like your cut G." Which is when you get a fresh cut. But I guess when you go bald, we can say, "Like your forehead, G."

I know it's really, really, really, really bad.