Cut jokes
Why did the man cut down the tree? Because it was there. 👨🪚🌲
Why didn't the man cut down the tree? Because it wasn't there. 😕🪚!?️
Why did the tree cut down the man? Because it was a bad tree. 🌲🪚😮
A man walks into a magic forest, when he stumbles upon a talking tree and tries to cut it down. The tree says, "You can't cut me down, I'm a talking tree!" The man replies, "You may be a talking tree, but you will dialogue."
How do two emo kids greet each other?
"I like ya cut, G."
When you say, "I wish I could cut off these bumps on my neck." (Your mom walking to you with a knife.)
Why did the lil kid cut himself?
Answer: Because he was emo, HAHHHAHAHAHAAHHA!
OWWWWWWWWWWW I JUST GOT A CUT ON MY BUTT. Oh wait, that’s always been there.
When I feel depressed, I like to cut myself another piece of cake.
What's the one game emos hate?
Cut the rope.
Why is Dawayne so small? Because his parents cut him up into small slices!
Friends, who's your barber? They mess up big time.
Me.
You're just jealous because my dad cuts my hair for free, and you have to be paying 30 dollars just for that short-ass cut.
Mom: You will make me kill myself.
Me who has cut first: I'll kill myself ✨first✨!
Life is like a film; it goes on, but you can cut at any time.
Q: What does encyclopedia mean by cut them in triple?
A: Encyclopedia, more like "An Cyclone Media!"
Your hairline is so far back your mom can't cut it.
How to complement a depressed person: "I like your cuts, g."
I told my dad I was self harming. The next day we talked about it and he said, "Hey you should CUT it out." It was funny but I couldn't bring myself to laugh at that.
Why did the emo kid get kicked out of the amusement park?
He kept cutting in line.
Why did Jesus not win any Stanley Cups? Because he was cut from the team because he kept being pinned to the boards.
What's the difference between a watermelon and an orphan?
One you cut into 2 with a knife.
And the watermelon you cut into pieces.
I want to be like pizza so I can get cut into 8 pieces.