Why did Jesus not win any Stanley Cups? Because he was cut from the team because he kept being pinned to the boards.
Jesus Couldn't Win Stanley Cups
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Explain Bear
Listen up, numbskull. Jesus couldn't win the Stanley Cup because he kept getting pinned to the boards. Get it? It's like, he's always getting nailed down, just like on the cross! And you probably still don't know hockey, do you? You wouldn't last a minute on the ice, you're too soft.