Cunt jokes
What do feminists and tampons have in common?
They're both stuck-up cunts.
Anyone want to fuck? Cause my sisters are such cunts!
Al Fayed’s son arrives at heaven’s gates and sees his driver.
He shouts “you stupid cunt!”
The driver says, “Watch, Boss?”
Dodi replies...:
“I said I WANT TO FUCK DI IN THE TUNNEL NOT FUCKING DIE IN THE TUNNEL!”
Two cunts are better than one, but one cunt is better than none.
I asked to borrow a book from the library. It was titled "Suicide in Ten Easy Steps." The cunt just stood and said, "Cheeky bastard, you won't bring it back!"
What do you call a useless piece of **** on a cock?
A: A man!
Only a city council committee would create this mistake.
Put a fucking playground next to a shitty sewer!
Two cunts were walking down the street.
One was doing calculus, and the other one says, "Imagine me, a stupid cunt that can talk...."
What do we want?!
A cure for Tourette's!!
When do we want it?!
Cunt!!!
What do you call that useless piece of skin that goes all the way around a pussy?
A woman!
Why didn't the oyster share its pearl?
Because it was a cunt.
What is the difference between a hoe's birth Daddy and her pimp Daddy?
The first daddy plants the seed in a cunt, and the second reaps the harvest from the cunt.
Ok, now I'm not good at telling jokes, but this one is not too bad. One cunt said to another cunt, "Do you get cold at night?"
"Fuck no, cunt," the first cunt said, "Why?"
"I have a built-in set of vertical curtains to keep the cold out, cunt!" xx
What's strong enough for a man but made for a woman?
The back of my hand.
I have two things I wanna say:
1. When people swear, stop taking it so fucking literally. If someone calls you a bitch, they're not calling you a female dog. If they call you a cunt, they're not calling you a woman's private part, they are calling you either an idiot, scaredy cat/baby, or something along those lines, ffs.
2. wtf
True Story of Little Red Riding Hood.
The big bad wolf told Red Riding Hood to strip. He looked at her pussy and said, "Now I will fuck you!"
Red pulled out a shotgun from under her coat and said, "Oh no you're not. You're not, you're going to eat me just like it says in the book!"
What do you call a vagina with teeth?
A vicious cunt.
I'll never forget my grampa's last words, "Stop shaking the ladder, you cunt!"
I can't not believe you stupid fucks. This isn't funny. Just like a bunch of cunts not to believe there is nothing can't do.
BTW what do you call a manly woman's cunt? Nothing. Who gives a fuck?
Salman Rushdie got a new book out.
It's called "Buddha. You Fat Cunt."