I heard that my crush got kicked in the balls and when I thought of it...
1st graders: ay yo girl I think you’re beautiful let’s get married!! 2nd graders: uhh don’t tell my mom that we’re dating!! She won’t let me date! Let’s keep this a seeeeecret heeheehee. 3rd graders: uh my teacher told me to stay after school because I wrote a poem about you and I’m 9 years old, we have to break up sweetie. 4th graders: hey I think you’re cute!! Wanna date? I don’t think my girlfriend will mind....... 5th graders(they start wearing makeup): ay girl your eyelashes are pretty I like you now, wanna date? Here’s my numberrrrrr. 6th graders: heyyyyy I gotta tell you a secret I got a crush on you!! Don’t tell anyone!! Byeee, ooh I’ll text you later! 7th graders: we need to make Peyton jealous because she broke up with you!! Wanna date? I mean, you’re not hot, but still, great personalityyyyy alright bye now 8th graders: hi sweetheart I got STARRRBUCKKKSSS Me: UGLY AF AND LITERALLY NO BOYFRIEND.....
Man 1:knock knock Man 2 hous there Man 1 ice Man 2 ice how Man 1 ice crushed your head
my girlfriend has a huge crush on Jupiter, I mean she fell HARD!!!!
You know I really love going to school and meeting my crush. All I have to do is go to the africa section
Wow gwen even said she loves Tj she just did prince look at it u are going to be crush it is in bored jokes and it has 65 comments look their!
Crush: "How much do you love me?"
Me: "Well, look at the stars outside."
Crush: "But it's morning."
Me: "Exactly."
Hi! This is a good prank I did! Okay My sister has this crush and his name is Braylon so he text my sister saying he wants to hang out with her which I think means date so anyway I did this My text said "Hi braylon, I can't hang out today...or the other day because I have homework, so please no hang out!" this is super wrong but funny! Braylon text back and said "Fine I can help" and I text back and said "Oh will come here around 10:00" And my sister did not know he was comeing....she was so embarrsed she was still in her night gown! HAHAHAH. O to the k bye thats the prankster!!!!
I told my mom that I have a crush. She replied with: "So you like girls?" I said: "Uhm no no no." BUT I'm lesbian. Someone help, how do I tell her without her hitting me with a belt?
I remember having a crush on my math teacher so i winked at her and said "dont worry babe, ill callculater."
Your mom is so fat that she broke your crush
I just quit my job at a can crushing factory.
It was soda-pressing.
Once a boy named penis had a crush on a girl named vagina their teacher found out and explained not to bump into each other ,as innocence they said yes .One day penis found his teacher in the bed naked masturbating ,the teacher wanted hardcore anal sex but vagina found it out and went to see them ,the teacher told vagina that its normal ,penis said ''Gosh that its normal ,i put my dildo in vaginas pussy .Then they three had a hell of a time and they all were pleasured but after six months they both had a child one named dildo and another named pussy. so,narrated it can be told that penis had sex with vagina and her teacher normally but ended up getting a dildo and pussy
Friend: I'm gonna go ask out my crush.
Me: *fake sneezes* Sorry, I'm allergic to bullshit.
have you heard about my new can crushing job?
it's soda-pressing
Why did the boy kill his girlfriend? Because he had a crush on her.
Yo mama so fat she fell in love with a skinny dude and tried to hug him but crushed him.
What did the 1.8 nanosecond old baby get for his birthday?
Nailed to a puppy falling on a buzz saw being crushed in a hydraulic press while being set on fire.
A big hefty porker left his balls exposed and said "Misses!! Come here and step upon mine balls please!!! I pay top dollar for this extreme delight! She pippity popped his balls like there was no tomorrow And he said "yuh yuh ay ay crush these nuts nuts"
My mom is a chemistry teacher. Mom: you can’t be attracted to something without it being attracted to you back Me: tell that to my FU*KING CRUSH B*TCH
