My mom is a chemistry teacher. Mom: you canβt be attracted to something without it being attracted to you back Me: tell that to my FU*KING CRUSH B*TCH
You know stairs right the dark my there is something I know that if you fall down the stairs your balls will be crushed
Your mum is so fat when she reached for the remote and when she found it it was crushed
You know I really love going to school and meeting my crush. All I have to do is go to the africa section
if yall gotta crush on me tell me now before my dad spends my valentines money on crack and alcohol
I confessed to my crush in preschool. Unfortunatley, she rejected me. I just carried on and got right back to teaching.
Hey Siri, whatβs in my bank account? You stupid shit, piece of elephant crap, youβre so ugly that when you were born, your nickname was bastard! Youβre so ugly, that your crush fainted in front of you and was proclaimed dead! Youβre so ugly that- (Destroys phone cutely)
Guy: Are you tired His βCrushβ: No Guy: Are you sure, because youβve been running through my mind all day His βCrushβ: Thatβs sweet. Guy: Iβm joking you donβt look like you do any running
My crushes best friend came up to me and called me my crushes dog π so then I say wow your an ass for calling me a bich he then looks at me wide eyed and I just walk away.
Man 1:knock knock Man 2 hous there Man 1 ice Man 2 ice how Man 1 ice crushed your head
A big hefty porker left his balls exposed and said "Misses!! Come here and step upon mine balls please!!! I pay top dollar for this extreme delight! She pippity popped his balls like there was no tomorrow And he said "yuh yuh ay ay crush these nuts nuts"
We r gonna crush u in the try not to laugh
What's a native chick say after sex? Get off me dad you're crushing my smokes
