Crime jokes
It isn't really rape if you speak different languages. I mean, how is the man supposed to know what she is saying? Those could be tears of joy and screams of pleasure.
It's not rape if they can't say no. Duct tape.
Jeffrey Dahmer and his mother are having dinner.
His mother says, “I don’t like your friends.”
Then Jeff says, “You can eat the potatoes.”
Person 1: How many people has Michael Jackson fingered?
Person 2: Dunno, what’s the minor population?
What does an armed bank robbery and Michael Jackson have in common?
Someone gets hurt.
What does Michael Jackson and Jeffery Dahmer have in common?
They both enjoy kids' company.
Got kidnapped in Iran. Luckily, I ran.
Your hairline is so messed up, it made Jeffrey Dahmer cry.
A boy is about to be sentenced for killing his parents. He begs the judge to spare his life. The judge asks for one good reason he should be shown any mercy. The boy replies, "I’m an orphan, your honor."
Today at the bank, an old lady asked me to help her check her balance.
So I pushed her over.
Your soul is black. I have 4 guns, little kid. Get in the van before I shoot you!
A guy gives labor to a baby girl and a boy twins. The doctor said but the lady was like,
"Ugh, why do I need my husband to be in labor and I want a girl, not a boy, just a girl!"
The lady passed out 😵 and then found out she was in a coma. The man who was in labor died. The two babies got a nanny, an evil one. The nanny killed the babies on their first birthday.
Why did the Muslim man cross the road? To violently rape an eight-year-old girl, then indoctrinate her with Islamic scripture, and train her as a suicide bomber.
What does a cannibal call a pregnant woman?
A kinder surprise.
The doctor gave me one year to live, so I shot him. The judge gave me 15 years. Problem solved.
What do you call a strong, independent girl in Haryana?
Dead.
There was a little kid crying in the park today. I asked him where his parents were. Now I realize, man, I love my job.
What's the quickest way to get to the hospital? Just stand in the middle of a busy road.
What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.
What do my dad and Nemo have in common? They both can't be found.
What do you do after raping a deaf person? Cut their fingers off so they don't tell anyone.
MORE JOKES COMING SOON LMAO ;]
What’s the best part of violently raping a sexy 10-year-old girl? Killing the little bitch afterwards.
Being raped is like a dance; sometimes it hurts, sometimes it hurts more.