Crime jokes
Today at the bank, an old lady asked me to help her check her balance.
So I pushed her over.
Your soul is black. I have 4 guns, little kid. Get in the van before I shoot you!
A guy gives labor to a baby girl and a boy twins. The doctor said but the lady was like,
"Ugh, why do I need my husband to be in labor and I want a girl, not a boy, just a girl!"
The lady passed out 😵 and then found out she was in a coma. The man who was in labor died. The two babies got a nanny, an evil one. The nanny killed the babies on their first birthday.
Why did the Muslim man cross the road? To violently rape an eight-year-old girl, then indoctrinate her with Islamic scripture, and train her as a suicide bomber.
What does a cannibal call a pregnant woman?
A kinder surprise.
The doctor gave me one year to live, so I shot him. The judge gave me 15 years. Problem solved.
What do you call a strong, independent girl in Haryana?
Dead.
There was a little kid crying in the park today. I asked him where his parents were. Now I realize, man, I love my job.
What's the quickest way to get to the hospital? Just stand in the middle of a busy road.
What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.
What do my dad and Nemo have in common? They both can't be found.
What do you do after raping a deaf person? Cut their fingers off so they don't tell anyone.
MORE JOKES COMING SOON LMAO ;]
What’s the best part of violently raping a sexy 10-year-old girl? Killing the little bitch afterwards.
Being raped is like a dance; sometimes it hurts, sometimes it hurts more.
What do you call someone who makes a joke about society?
The Joker.
What do you call a sneaky child molester?
Incogpedo.
What do you call terrorists in a wheelchair?
An RCXD.
Why do rapists and pedophiles never win a race?
Because they always like to come in a little behind.
Why does Batman cover half of his face? To let the police know that he's white.
Why did Stephen Hawking die?
He pirated GTA VI Hindi No Virus 2022.
I have been charged, because I roasted a kid at a barbeque.
There was a school fire. I pushed the wheelchair kid into the fire and said, "Hot wheels!"
Girl: "Hey, why don't you come over?"
Guy: "I can't. Cops are looking for me, they say I killed 2 people."
Girl: "C'mon, my parents aren't home."
Guy: "About that..."