Cow

Cow jokes

Beef

What did the policeman shout to the cow running away?

"Get to the ground, beef!"

Renovation

What happens when a cow farm gets destroyed, then built up again?

It'll be udder renovation!

Beef

What do you call it when a cow gets disciplined by her parents?

Grounded beef.

Orphan

Why do orphans have water with their cereal?

Because the dad never came back with the cow.

Memes

Man

A man went hunting with his son and shot an animal.

The father asks the son to identify the animal he just shot, and the son answers: "Holy Cow!"

Father: "What do you mean, 'Holy Cow?'"

Son: "You shot a hole in the cow, of course!"

Farmer

A farmer artificially impregnated a cow. The cow said to another cow, "It's a miracle, I'm pregnant." The other cow said, "That's impossible, it's only us cows in the field, you must be joking." The first cow said, "Nope, I'm serious... no bull!"

Sperm

WOULD YOU RATHER:

Eat 20 lbs of cow s**t?

or

Drink a gallon of sperm?

DNA

What do you get when you cross cow DNA with human DNA?

Kicked out of the petting zoo.

Astronaut

Why did the cow want to be an astronaut?

Because it wanted to see the Milky Way!

Farmer

The farmers were playing chess, and the winner shouted and said: "I killed your horse!"

The second quickly left, and when he returned he said: "We have poisoned all your cows!"

Movie

What did the cow πŸ„ watch? moooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooovies πŸ˜‚πŸ„πŸ–₯

Cowculator

Idiot 1: Why are cows good in math?

Idiot 2: I don't know why.

Idiot 1: Because they have built-in cowculators!

Dachshund

Why did the Texas cow own its own dachshund?

The cowboy told it to "get along little doggie."

Dance

If I was a cow and could dance, I'd bust some moooooves while I uddered some lyrics!