Construction jokes
What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? (Dam!)
I said to the fish, "I have dam."
What did the fish say when he got to the dam?
"Dam water."
"Dam!"
Yo hairline so ugly even Bob the Builder said he couldn't fix it.
Why are planes the fastest readers? Because they went through 100 stories in 20 seconds.
Why can't gay men be handymen?
Because they'll be caulk fighting on the job.
Two fish walked into a wall. One said to the other, "Dam!"
We have invented the spade! This is groundbreaking!
"What did one wall say to the other?"
"I'll meet you at the corner!"
The shovel was a groundbreaking invention.
Why does Trump play Minecraft?
'Cause he can build walls.
Mortar is like a woman's fanny; the more you play with it, the wetter it gets.
My tutor just said this quote of 2k18^^^
Pontypool is rough.
Don't be racist, I am a building.
Twin Towers: fucked.
It was fake.
BE RACIST.
Have you heard of the invention of the shovel? It's groundbreaking!
What goes up and down and does not move?
Stairs.
I don't trust stairs, they're always up to something.
Why is a brick always hard? Because he seen the brick that was getting laid right next to him.
How did the carpenter do on his interview? He nailed it!
I have a joke about construction. I'm still working on it.
Jeffery Dahmer has two things: an RV and a pit.
What is different about the two is that one can't move and one has gas.
But what is similar is tha-
Wait, what is Jeffery doing? He has a knife, he is pulling men's pants down, he is...OH SHIT WHAT THE F-!
Sorry 'bout that......
Now, as I was saying,
What is similar about the two is that one has and is a cockpit.
Wait, a cockpit- JEFFERY WHAT THE F-!