Construction jokes
A homeless man sits in front of a Home Depot. A man walking out of the store hands him some money and asks, "Why are you in front of the Home Depot?" And the man says, "Isn't it obvious? Hoping somebody accidentally drops the house they just bought."
Q: How many children does it take to shingle a roof?
A: Depends on how thinly you slice them.
The experienced carpenter really nailed it, but the new guy screwed everything up.
What were the twin towers plains?
God's playing Jenga.
What do you call a sleeping bull? A bulldozer!
Q: What is a lesbian's version of a cock block?
A: A beaver dam.
Why should you be wary of stairs? -- Because they are always up to something.
WARNING OFFENSIVE: What is the difference between a redhead and a brick? ... A brick gets laid.
How many babies does it take to shingle a roof? Depends on how thin you slice them. -Hope Marie Lawson
What is Donald Trump's favorite game?
Fortnite. Because he can build walls for free.
Why do people keep on making jokes about the twin towers?
Because they go down so well.
Do you have a shovel? Because I'm digging that ass.
My mom wanted me to build her a shed for her useless things, then she told me to go live in it.
Why does OSHA require women to wear panties?
Because every manhole needs a cover.
What's red and really bad for your teeth? A brick.
What's harder than steel? Joe Biden at a playground.
Why were the Twin Towers mad? Because when they spawned in a Minecraft world, all they got was plains.
What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.
Let's play carpenter. First, we'll get hammered, then I'll nail you.
What's the Twin Towers' favorite Minecraft biome?
A plains biome.