Conflict Jokes

Why did the rapper refuse to write a diss track?

He didn’t want to start beef, he’s VEGAN

What is the difference between a redhead and a terrorist?

You can negotiate with a terrorist!

My neighbor has been mad at his wife for sunbathing nude. I personally am on the fence.

So one time I was looking up the definition of accident because I was a little dumbo and didn’t know what it meant. Then my sister walks up behind me, and points at the word and says, “That’s you!”(meaning that I was an accident) A few minutes later, we had a big family meeting and my dad said to my sister, “Sweetie, you were an accident. We didn’t mean to make you. But we still love you with everything we’ve got.”

My sister never talked to me again and left the house. She was 17 when she left. Seriously, 17-year-olds just never mature, huh?

do you know why the cake doesn't ever fight anyone?

he says "take a peace of that!" while entering a fight.

The north and south towers got into an argument.

The south tower said “we will talk about this when we are on the ground”

“If two sides in a battlefield read my book, there will be no winner” Sun Tzu, The Art of War

My friend was in Afghanistan when he saw someone got shot and then they bumbed him know he called them the talkwakers

How do you break up a fight between two gay men Say can you get straight to the point

Why was 2019 afraid of 2020? Because they had a fight and 2021.

What if you put a scared homosexual guy and an angry homophobic guy inside a stable ?

Hmm let's see, if the homosexual guy has some good luck maybe he will meet a super unicorn and helps him out to defeat the angry homophobic guy :D

if WW3 starts i do infact belong in the kitchen

Why were the twin towers fighting

Because they ordered pepperoni but got plaine

Guy your hairline was the reason adolf hitler said let there be war

Women be like men cause wars forgets men fight those wars while they fake cry

Iran: we can beat the USA

Japan: YOU DO REALIZE WE BEAT HIM IN BATTLE SHIP AND HE DROPPED THE SUN ON US

Iran: So?

Japan: TWICE

So I am an emo dude so I sit in the back of the class and I talk to no one.But one day this dude came up to me and tried to talk to me so I just ignored him.Then he got really pissed off and said “I’m gonna kill you”.I was like “Your gonna kill me just because I ignored you, is your ego that big, wow.”He left then the next day he brought his goons with him and said “now your dead” I ignored him again and he said “you will pay for this.”So the following day after school I was walking down the street back to my house then him and his goons tried to attack me, but then they died so I kept on walking.I had some rope traps set.This was the best day of my life.

This is why you never mess with emo’s.We have ropes everywhere.

On Paxomedy channel I made a video of a Rooster and a dog fighting. I needed to know why they were fighting. Once I dag down the issue it turned out that the Dog called the Rooster a Cock and the Rooster laughed and called the Dog a useless Bitch and that was the beginning of their fight and wierd enough the Cock won! I went to congratulate the winner but he thought he was insulting me by calling me Zinjathropus but I said that was a compliment because Zinja was an old skeleton found in Africa and I am African. I said to the Rooster he shouldnt have fought with the dog just because he called him a Cock. He said that being called a Cock is a compliment and the fighting was his exercise to toughen up for serious fights with Dogs!