New Computer Jokes - Page 2 - Worst Jokes Ever

Here are 20 jokes for you:

Why don't scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything!

What did one wall say to the other wall? I'll meet you at the corner!

Why don't skeletons fight each other? They don't have the guts!

Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!

How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together!

Did you hear about the mathematician who's afraid of negative numbers? He'll stop at nothing to avoid them!

How does a bee style its hair? With a honeycomb!

Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two-tired!

What do you call fake spaghetti? An impasta!

What's the difference between a snowman and a snowwoman? Snowballs!

Why don't eggs tell jokes? Because they might crack up!

Why don't scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything!

What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear!

Why don't skeletons fight each other? They don't have the guts!

What did one plate say to the other plate? Dinner is on me!

Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing!

Why don't seagulls fly over the bay? Because then they would be bagels!

Why was the math book sad? Because it had too many problems!

How does a computer get drunk? It takes screenshots!

What do you call a sleeping bull? A bull-dozer!

I hope these jokes brought a smile to your face! Let me know if you'd like to hear more.

Y'all, I'm suspended till Wednesday and can't do much cuz I'm on a tablet, not my computer. Tell autterpop I won't be on till Wednesday or after.

Yo mama so dumb, when her computer was asking for cookies, she grabbed a cookie, smashed it onto the screen, and broke the computer.

A computer is like a living organism. Its charger is its life support. If you "pull the plug," you are letting it slowly die.

You're so fat that when they tried to print a picture of you through the computer, they couldn't fit you in the whole picture because you were so big!

What did Stephen Hawking see before he died?

The blue screen of death.

I felt bad for a dog, and I looked to my left, and there was an orphan, and I said I will make you a website, and I said there won't be a homepage.

"Warning, all unsaved progress will be lost." - Sun Tzu, The Art Of War.

I don't know what an HD is, but my doctor says I have 80 of 'em'.

Boss: How good are you at PowerPoint?

Me: I Excel at it.

Boss: Was that a Microsoft pun?

Me: Word.

ENTER PASSWORD.

WRONG.

RESET PASSWORD.

NEW PASSWORD CAN'T BE OLD PASSWORD.

Sets fire to computer.

It's just been discovered that as well as writing a book, Adolf Hitler also wrote one of the first computer games, "Mein Kraft."

Why can't the Ctrl key cross the road? Because it is an 8-lane highway.

A man is dating three women and has to choose which one he'll marry. He decides to give them a test. He gives each woman a present of $5000 and watches to see what she does with the money.

The first woman does a total make-over. She goes to a fancy beauty salon, gets her hair done, new make up and buys several new outfits to look sexy for the man. She tells him that she has done this to be more attractive for him because she loves him so much. The man was impressed.

The second woman goes shopping to buy the man gifts. She gets him a new set of golf clubs, some new gizmos for his computer, and some expensive clothes. As she presents these gifts, she tells him that she has spent all the money on him because she loves him so much. Again, the man is impressed.

The third woman invests the money in the stock market. She earns several times the $5000. She gives him back his $5000 and reinvests the remainder in a joint account. She tells him that she wants to save for their future because she loves him so much. Obviously, the man was impressed.

The man thought for a long time about what each woman had done with the money... Then he married the one with the biggest breasts.