I met a guy in a wheelchair today. His face was battered and bruised. "What happened to your face?" I asked.
"I'm a Paralympian," he replied.
"Boxing?"
"No, ... hurdles."
Two artists had an art contest. -- It ended in a draw.
Why was Cinderella banned from playing sports? -- Because she always ran away from the ball.
My girlfriend and I often laugh about how competitive we are... But I laugh more.
The Somalian Olympics Team has just apologized to the Olympic Committee after realizing that sailing and shooting were two separate events.
What do sprinters eat before a race? -- Nothing, they fast.
Chuck Norris wins a staring contest. -- Against Medusa.
Why doesn't Mexico compete in the Olympics?
Because all the Mexicans who can run, jump, and swim are in the U.S.
