Common jokes
Why can't orphans play baseball? They don’t know where home is.
I made a website for orphans, but it doesn't have a home page.
Doctor: I’m going to have to turn you away. Orphan: But why? Doctor: Because I’m a family doctor.
Why do orphans like boomerangs? Cause they come back.
Why do orphans become criminals? To know what it’s like to be wanted.
Girls are like rocks; the flat ones get skipped.
What’s an orphan’s least favorite TV show? Family Guy.
If you hit an orphan, what are they going to do? Tell their parents?
If you hit an orphan with a car, at least you don't have to tell their parents.
Why did the orphan go to church? So he had someone to call Father.
What does an orphan call a family photo? A selfie.
Why was the orphan a big success? Cause people say go big or go home, he only had one option.
Why is it ok to hit an orphan? It’s not like they can tell their parents.
What’s an orphan’s least favorite store? Home Depot.
What do orphans and blind kids have in common? They can’t see their parents.
Why can't orphans hear about ancient Egypt? Because they don’t know what a mummy is.
Why are orphans bad at poker? Because they don't know what a full house is.
What do you call a virgin from Alabama? An orphan.
Donald Trump and Fanta both have some things in common.
They are both orange and were conceived from Nazis!
What do a bullet and a police officer have in common?
When a bullet kills someone, it gets fired.
What do a bungee jump and a hooker have in common?
They’re both cheap, fast, and if the rubber breaks, you’re pretty much screwed.
What does a woman’s pussy and a chainsaw have in common?
Miss by a few inches and you’re in deep shit.
What does a pregnant slave and a "pay less" sale have in common?
Buy one, get one free.
What do birds and planes have in common?
They both fly into building windows.
What does a pencil and a plan have in common?
They were both in the Twin Towers.
What does broccoli and sex have in common?
If you were forced to have it as a kid, you’re gonna hate it as an adult.
What do a blind kid and an orphan have in common?
They can’t see their parents.
What do alcoholics and gas prices have in common?
They both get really high.
What’s something Bill Cosby and Freddy Krueger have in common?
Once you fall asleep, you’re fucked.
What do the Twin Towers and Angry Birds' pigs have in common?
They always getting hit.
What do ninjas and depressed people have in common?
They're always cutting.
My sister and a basketball got certain things in common.
My sister's tits and ass are bouncy like a basketball.
What do me and a blind person have in common after I look at Alfie's mum?
We're both blind.
Girl: Come over.
Orphan: I can’t.
Girl: My parents aren’t home.
Orphan: Oh, cool, something we have in common.
What does a paleontologist and woke people have in common?
They both enjoy digging up the past.
What do rocks and girls have in common?
The flat ones get skipped.
What do the Twin Towers and your siblings have in common?
Once they turn 18, they never come back.