What do me and a blind person have in common after I look at Alfie's mum?
We're both blind.
Common Jokes
My sister and a basketball got certain things in common.
My sister's tits and ass are bouncy like a basketball.
What do Marie Antoinette and 2005-2012 Korn have in common?
They're both Headless.
What’s something Bill Cosby and Freddy Krueger have in common?
Once you fall asleep, you’re fucked.
What does broccoli and sex have in common?
If you were forced to have it as a kid, you’re gonna hate it as an adult.
What do the Twin Towers and Angry Birds' pigs have in common?
They always getting hit.
Why can't orphans play baseball? They don’t know where home is.
I made a website for orphans, but it doesn't have a home page.
Doctor: I’m going to have to turn you away. Orphan: But why? Doctor: Because I’m a family doctor.
Why do orphans like boomerangs? Cause they come back.
Why do orphans become criminals? To know what it’s like to be wanted.
Girls are like rocks; the flat ones get skipped.
What’s an orphan’s least favorite TV show? Family Guy.
If you hit an orphan, what are they going to do? Tell their parents?
If you hit an orphan with a car, at least you don't have to tell their parents.
Why did the orphan go to church? So he had someone to call Father.
What does an orphan call a family photo? A selfie.
Why was the orphan a big success? Cause people say go big or go home, he only had one option.
Why is it ok to hit an orphan? It’s not like they can tell their parents.
What’s an orphan’s least favorite store? Home Depot.
What do orphans and blind kids have in common? They can’t see their parents.
Why can't orphans hear about ancient Egypt? Because they don’t know what a mummy is.
Why are orphans bad at poker? Because they don't know what a full house is.
What do you call a virgin from Alabama? An orphan.
What do a bullet and a police officer have in common?
When a bullet kills someone, it gets fired.
What do Jim Kelly and Dick Cheney have in common?
They both make terrible hunters.
What do birds and children have in common?
If you shoot them, they die.
What do orphans and sperm donor kids have in common? They don't have dads.
What do a penis and a Rubik’s Cube have in common?
The more you play with it, the harder it gets.
What do orphans and broken up couples have in common?
They can't see each other anymore.
What do orphans and homework have in common?
Everybody forgets about them.
What do you and orphans have in common?
Nobody loves you.
What does an orphan and a lost kid have in common?
They have no way home.
What do my balls and emos have in common?
...Nothing, they both hang themselves...
What do Christmas decorations and dead people have in common?
They both hang from a tree!
What do a priest and Christmas tree lights have in common?
They can both flash.
What do clothes and emo kids have in common?
They both get hung.
