Common jokes
What is the most common crime in China?
Identity fraud.
What do a fisherman and a prostitute have in common?
They're both hookers.
What do a gay guy in a wheelchair and a tomato have in common?
They’re both a fruit AND a vegetable!
What do a 14-year-old and the fetus inside her have in common?
They both say, "Ohh sh*t, my mom is going to kill me!"
What do kids with cancer and cancer jokes have in common?
CANCER!
Just kidding, they are both fun to laugh at.
What does a rock and a girl have in common?
The flat ones get skipped.
What does the orphan have in common with Batman? They both lost their parents.
Have you ever heard of the stupid coyote? He got stuck in a trap, chewed off three of his legs, and was still stuck!
What does grass and Rachel Sutherland’s wrists have in common: nothing, they both get cut.
What do my clothes and a depressed person not have in common?
My clothes don't hang themselves...
What do a blonde and a doorknob have in common?
Everyone gets a turn ;)
What do gay people and mice have in common?
They both hate pussy cats!
What's the one thing me and the New Year's ball have in common?
It's not gonna be the only thing falling 50 stories this New Year's.
What do gasses and asses have in common? They both have asses in them!
2 weeks here.
What do dicks and popsicles have in common?
They both like to be sucked on, and they sometimes choke you.
What do gum and guns have in common?
When you pull one out, everyone wants to be your friend all of a sudden.
What's Barack Obama's favorite vegetable? It's Barack-olli.
What did Mickey Mouse and Michael Jackson have in common?: (What *didn't* they have in common)
Same red shorts, theme park in their backyard, white glove, soft voices, loved children, they both were black with white faces.
What do a school shooter and a person with gum have in common?
One's the pull it out everyone wants to be their friend.
What do screen doors and blondes have in common?
The more you bang them, the looser they get.