Comedy jokes
Q. What is Terri Schiavo's favorite Eminem song?
A. "Till I Collapse."
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Uriah. Uriah who? Keep Uriah on the ball, Laquon Treadwell!
Once I was asked to perform snail jokes at a stand-up comedy night. I certainly snailed it because the crowd thought it was shellerious.
My god, my egg jokes are eggcellent!
What do you call a guy in a wheelchair that does comedy?
Sit down comedy.
A buddy and I checked out some books from a local library. When we returned them, he said, "Your sister works the returns, right?" I told him, "Yes, she does, and she will be here in about five minutes." He said, "Why don’t we put a cookbook in the women’s sports section?" I told him, "I love it!" So I picked out a Reese Witherspoon book.
Wanna me to show you a joke?
*Points at face* Funny, right?
Wanna hear a funny joke?
You
What do you call an Eskimo stripper?
A frosty-tute.
Why do people enjoy orphan jokes! Lol... I LOVE IT >:)
"You're really hot, I wanna hit on you like the plane hit the Twin Towers."
When you're watching "Gnomeo and Juliet 2" and your dad walks in on the gnome shaking his butt.
This is a short joke! This short joke is long. Nice joke, Mr. Steve.
I love silly jokes.
These jokes are EGGxactly why I became a comedian, and I know how to BAKE on breakfast.
2 jokes in a row babyyyyy!
Guess why a lot of orphans were in "Home Alone"? Because their family left them.
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Pilot: So Kobe, it seems like you’re not going to make it to your destination in time, so I’m going to put it on autopilot so I can find a place to fill with gas.
Kobe: Take us to the side of that mountain at full speed. I don’t really want to go to the event anymore.
Why did God steal a rib from Adam and make a woman out of it?
God wanted to show that nothing sensible can come of stealing!
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Your dad.
But my dad's dead.
I know, just reminding you!