Comedy jokes
Some dude called me a tool.
So later I got hammered and nailed his girlfriend.
Guess he was right :/
What do you call a tall terrorist?
Osama Bin Laden.
How does a blonde turn the light off after sex?
She closes the car door.
Osama bin laden hit the towers because he couldnt fly straight
What do you call a white guy who can actually dance? Jewish.
Me and my grandpa went on a road trip, and he died. That was the last thing we did together, and I will never forget his last words: “WAKE UP YOU DUMBASS!”
Dez nuts!
What movie do atheists watch for Christmas?
"Coincidence on 34th Street."
Want to hear an abortion joke, or any joke for that matter? You have that option, and you can thank your mother for that.
But that's a question that will never be heard by an aborted unborn baby, whose only option was death. And that's no joke.
These are bee puns.🐝
I BEElieve you are eager to hear!🐝
I love to BEE a little 9 years old writing on this page.🐝
(Last one) I want to BEEcome a BEE. ;-; I kid... Like this now and please Subscribe to Kelly Qin on YouTube and she is my mom and she has a bake channel!
What's the difference between you and an egg?
An egg gets laid.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Interrupting cow.
Interrupting cow wh---
MOOOO!
Pokemon Jokes!
What do you do when your Loudred evolves?
Buy more earplugs!
Why do orphans hate knock knock jokes?
Because there is never anyone at the door.
Me: I want to be a stand-up comedian.
Friend: You have to be able to stand up.
What do dark humor and a person with scoliosis have in common?
Both are sick and twisted.
Three guys landed on a cannibal island. The cannibal chef told them if they wanted to live, they had to go get 10 of one fruit and bring it to him, and he would tell them what to do.
So the first guy brings 10 apples, and the chef said if he could shove all 10 of those in his ass without making a sound, he could live. He was three apples in and made a sound, and they ate him. The second guy brought grapes; nine grapes in, and he burst out laughing. The cannibals ate him. Then the first guy said, "Why'd you laugh? You were almost there!" The other guy who had the grapes said, "I couldn't help it, I was told the third guy came back with 10 pineapples."
Do you like Wendy's? When deez nutz are in your mouth.
What's the difference between a priest and a pimple?
A pimple will wait until you're 12 years old to come on your face.
These jokes are so dark that they picked the cotton!