Comedy Jokes

Hey, I know this is a classic joke but I found it pretty funny!

"My name is 4, four like the number," my friend said. "What, was 1 2 3 taken?"

I can even with it but I was bored and decided to share this.

James Woods, starring in the newest movie: "September 11, two thousand fun."

Why were the people in the Twin Towers such good readers?

They went through 110 stories in 10 seconds.

The reason why Trailer Park Boys is set in Nova Scotia and not Alabama is because if it was set in Alabama, then they would have to record every instance of incest. And the show's writers would need to know how to cram all of it in one season.

What's the best thing about an abortion joke??

No one gets offended.

There is nothing funnier than my life. (Evan 2020)

What do you call two monkeys who share the same Amazon account? Prime mates.

I hate jokes about 9/11... every joke has the tendency to crash and burn.

"I didn't get the joke at first, but then it hit me like a plane," the joke was so dark a cop almost shot it.

Guys, we should not make fun of 9/11. Like, that stuff is just plain out crazy. Like, you all should not let that fly.

I would tell you an orphan joke, ehh I’ll just tell your parents instead.

Hickory dickory dock. My wife avoids my cock. She's losing her and having an affair. So I had to slap Chris Rock.

Once I tried to tell my friend a joke about dead people... but it went six feet underground...

Student: "May I use the restroom, professor?"

Professor: "Oui oui."

Student: "No, professor, doo doo!"

The best joke in the world is me.

Don't say that you're not a joke. Jokes have meanings.

Public speaking is a more popular fear than snakes, and you don't see anyone walking in Australia and shout, "Look out! A podium!"

How do rappers keep themselves clean?

They drop SOAP BARS.

What’s the difference between dark jokes and cotton?

Some people don’t pick it.

Mickey Mouse is speaking with a divorce attorney...

...and the attorney says, "I'm sorry Mickey, I've gone over all of Minnie's medical history and I find no evidence of mental illness."

To which Mickey replies, "I didn't say she's crazy! I said she's fucking Goofy!"

They made a horror movie about the Chinese president.

It's called "Winnie the Pooh: Blood and Honey."

Q: What do you call a black prostitute in space?

A: The Blackhole.