Comedy jokes
If 2 vegetables have an argument, it's called beef.
Why are the same Sally jokes told over and over again?
Because how can you tell jokes about someone who's dead?
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Boo.
Boo who?
Don't cry, baby!
Why did Johnny drop his pencil?
To look up girls' skirts! 😬🤯😲😳😱🙀🙊
Anyone else think High School Musical would have been a better film with a school shooter?
Why don't orphans play GTA?
Because they're sad they don't get wanted!
Have you heard of deez nuts?
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What's the best thing about 9/11 jokes...
They make you collapse with laughter because the Twin Towers collapsed.
Who thinks people should stop doing orphan jokes? Type here so we can talk about it.
Guys, can we stop this stupid drama? I just wanna post my "Doin' Your Mom" lyrics and funny jokes! Please stop it!
I'mma monch ur nan's feet at 3 am tonight, ngl.
I saw a cat. It said, "Raisin" when he saw a nut. Hahaha, I am a crappy joker. Put me in the nerd club.
I love silly jokes.
There's a new horror movie about Stephen Hawking.
It's called "Unplugged!"
Q. What do Kenny's dick and this joke have in common?
A. They're both really short.
A bear and a rabbit are at a bar getting high, smoking weed, talking about nothing but lies and straight up garbage.
And then the bear starts to drink too much damn liquor, gets drunk, and asks the rabbit, "Can I have one more scotch, pretty please?"
And the rabbit says, "Hell to the naw, I'm not about to carry your drunk ass home with me and smell your breath."
Three guys landed on a cannibal island. The cannibal chef told them if they wanted to live, they had to go get 10 of one fruit and bring it to him, and he would tell them what to do.
So the first guy brings 10 apples, and the chef said if he could shove all 10 of those in his ass without making a sound, he could live. He was three apples in and made a sound, and they ate him. The second guy brought grapes; nine grapes in, and he burst out laughing. The cannibals ate him. Then the first guy said, "Why'd you laugh? You were almost there!" The other guy who had the grapes said, "I couldn't help it, I was told the third guy came back with 10 pineapples."
A bully chokes me. I simply say, "Joke's on you, I like being choked!"
Like this.