Comedy jokes
I would make a disabled joke.
But they never work.
My girlfriend's dog died, so I tried to cheer her up by getting her an identical one.
It just made her more upset. She screamed at me, "What am I supposed to do with two dead dogs?"
Biggest joke?
[Image of Zac Efron]
Welcome to our Computer Show.
I'm Mars Argo.
Welcome to youtube.com.
So I walked into this bar and thought, "Wow, this is a dull joke."
I don't like jokes.
People say dogs are like their owners. So true. My dog keeps on running into the street as if she doesn't care about her life.
I don't care about her life either hahahaha!! :)
A brunette, a red-head, and a blonde are being chased by bandits. They are chased to the edge of a cliff and a genie appears.
"I will help you escape," says the genie, "say what you wish to turn into, and you will become that thing."
The brunette jumps off the cliff and says "Hawk." She turns into a hawk and flies away. The red-head says "Falcon." She turns into a falcon and flies away. Now the blonde is alone and the bandits are getting closer. She makes her decision and backs up, then runs toward the cliff. And...she trips and says "Crap."
The End
Your hairline looks like the McDonald's logo!
Spaceballs: The Joke.
Why did Stephen Hawking make it to heaven?
He couldn't make it up the stairs.
Hahahahahahah I'm dying.
Imagine the Russians showing up late to the 1917 revolution with a Tsarbucks in hand. They were late, so I guess they weren't Russian. They were probably Stalin.
How do you get 500 babies in a phone booth?
A blender.
How do you get them out?
A straw.
These murder jokes are just KILLING me!
Why did the man die of the actor's performance?
The performance was unbeLIVEable!
How did you get Sally into a blender?
- Without much resistance.
How do you get Sally out of a blender?
- Tortilla chips.
Apparently, I'm a category for jokes now. Hmm... ok!
#HOMIEZ4Life
P.S. Say "crack my finger," now say it backwards :)
Why didn't the Japanese guy get a high five?
Logan Paul left him hanging.
Communist jokes aren't funny unless everyone gets them.
I would tell a pussy joke, but you would never get it.