Children jokes
I was at a friend's place yesterday, and... There was a mother, father, three sons, and a daughter.
That night the mother and father started fucking each other. I yelled and told them there are innocent children in this house.
An hour later, they started up again. I walked to their room and they were asleep, so I looked in the brothers' room and all three brothers were fucking the sister.
I sighed at this. "Incest aside, you guys make a cute family." I started, "So Anna, when am I gonna have nieces and nephews?" They stopped instantly and went to sleep. "Thank you," I replied before walking back to my room they let me sleep in and I passed out for the rest of the night.
I was listening to my children praying, and my youngest that can speak said to me: "Mama, why is Gramma dead?"
I smiled and told her, "Well, less than 10 years ago when I was 5, your age, my Momma took me into the basement with some hot rando during a party. And 9 months later Shinana was born. One Pedo after another and your 4 siblings were born. The Pedo I met last night told me, 'If your mother's the one making you do this, do what you do best.' I listened and the next day she didn't leave her bed breathing. When the Pedo found out he left me and your soon to be brother."
She replies with, "Make his child support expensive!" Now he has to pay me 2,000 U.S. dollars every month, like the other ones that ran away.
Why can’t orphans have a horse?
Because they run away like their mum did.
What's the difference between a road bump and children crossing the road?
A road bump will make you slow down when you drive over it.
Why are orphans terrible at baseball? They never get home runs.
How fast did Little Sally paint the barn red?
As soon as the bomb exploded on her.
Are all orphans home-a-phobic?
I was walking home when I saw children crossing the street on their own. I went towards him and tapped his shoulder and said, "Hey, little kid, you are not supposed to be walking on your own." The kid turns out to be a dwarf.
Why do orphans become hookers?
They can call someone daddy.
What were the orphan's mom and dad's names? John and Jane Doe.
What does Mrs. Grapes 🍇 love the most?
Raisin' kids.
Why wouldn’t Mrs. Grapes leave her children behind?
Because she loves raisin kids.
What's the difference between dark humor and morbid humor?
Dark humor is 10 babies in a trash can. Morbid humor is 1 baby in 10 trashcans.
I'm about to go to the orphanage to tell yo mama jokes.
What do kids with cancer and cancer jokes have in common?
They never get old.
Did you know the letter "F" in orphan stands for family?
What do a Make-A-Wish kid and mosquitoes have in common?
They both got a 10% survival rate...
What goes up but never past the digits 15?
A Make-A-Wish kid...
I tell orphan jokes like there ain’t no parents around.
Mother: Who do you like more, me or your dad?
Liam: I like you both.
Mother: Ok, if I go to america and your dad goes to paris, where will you go?
Liam: I will go to paris.
Mother: That's means you like dad more.
Liam: No, its because i like paris.
Mother: Ok, fine, if I go to paris and your dad goes to america, where will you go?
Liam: I will go to America.
Mother: Why?
Liam: Because I have already gone to paris.