Children jokes
My daughter is the most adorable little girl in the world. She's got my sister's eyes.
Can't wait for the orphans to have their family reunion! Wait...
What did the priest say to the other in the orphanage? "Let us prey together."
What's the difference between a school bus and my Dad's van?
School buses usually don't have screaming and crying children.
What's the one good thing about pedophiles? They slow down near schoolzones.
Say what you want about pedophiles, but at least they drive slow through school zones.
The Make-A-Wish Foundation has gone too far. All of the Make-A-Wish kids asked for cancer to be gone, so they just gave the cancer to all of the Make-A-Wish kids.
Man, don't you hate it when you hit a speed bump by an orphanage but then realize there's no speed bumps here...
What do you get when you have an annoying kid, a homicidal kid, and a suicidal kid in the same room? A happy ending.
What's the difference between an ISIS militant base and a Pakistani children's school?
I don't know, I just fly the drone.
They laughed at my crayon drawing.
I laughed at their chalk outline.
Why do orphans always get picked on? They can't run and tell their parents.
Stop with the dead baby jokes. We're running out of babies.
The person to make the first cannabinol cookbook had a wife and ate (eight) children.
What's yellow and can't swim?
A bus full of children.
Grandpa: "You can't have phones within 15 feet of the table."
Me: "And you aren't allowed within 100 feet of the elementary school."
Why are babies called bundles of joy?
When you break the bundle, it gives you joy.
Why are orphans bad at baseball?
Because they don’t know what a home is.
What do you call a five year old with no friends?
A Sandy Hook survivor.
Q: A mom had 5 children: January, February, March, April. What is the name of the fifth child?
A: What.