Why did little Timmy drop his ice cream cone?
He got hit by a bus.
Children Jokes
There once was a woman who had 10 kids. Their names were:
Tenth, Twenty, Thirty, Forty, Fifty, Sixty, Seventy, Eighty, Ninety, and One Hundred.
Everyone but Ninety died. She also had 10 kids.
These 10 kids got a dog without Ninety knowing. They had him for 2 years until he got hit by a car.
Only Ninety's kids know about this.
I put the D in Children.
So, I was fucking this bitch, right, and I thought I had AIDS.
So I go and get tested. Turns out I did get AIDS. Now what I'm wondering is where the hell does an eight-year-old get AIDS?! I guess my sister needs new friends...
An American mother has 3 children. The first child asked his mum: "Why is my sister called Crazy Horse and my brother Rushing Water?"
Mum: "Because those were the first thing I saw after i gave birth to them. Why are you asking all these questions, two dogs fucking?"
What do my baby and dinosaurs have in common? They are both dead.
A man asks a woman, "Are you a school?"
The woman replies, "No, why?"
The man says, "Oh, I wanted to shoot my kid inside of you."
What's a pedophile's favorite type of garden?
A kindergarden.
I made a website for orphans. Unfortunately, it doesn't have a homepage.
When you hit a speed bump in a school zone and remember, there are no speed bumps.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall?
Depends on how hard you throw them, with fuck.
What's hot and hard?
Me when I look at children.
What has 4 legs and 1 arm?
A pitbull in a children's play area.
20 years of sex in the dark, the wife finds out he was using a dildo. The wife gets angry and says, "Explain the dildo, prick." The husband says, "Explain the children, bitch."
What do you call a convict in prison for touching little girls? A boy named Brandon.
Can orphans eat at a family restaurant?
Why does Peter Pan always fly? Because he Neverlands.
A priest and a rabbi run out of a burning church, and the priest says, "What about the children?" The rabbi says, "Fuck the children." And the priest says, "Do you think we'll have time?"
How many beaten children does it take to change a light bulb for a drunken father?
Apparently not enough to impress him.
Alle Kinder heißen Melissa, nur nicht Melissa, er heißt Kurt fra Zonen.
