Childhood jokes
Me: Sister, stop stealing my stuff or I will make you feel bad.
Sister: No, I won't stop.
Me: Fine, I'm telling the world what you did.
Sister: What? You will see when I post it.
Sister: WHY DID YOU TELL THEM I PEED ON SANTA CLAUS WHEN I WAS 12 YEARS OLD?
Me: BECAUSE YOU DON ́T HAVE A LIFE.
When I was a child, I was made to walk the plank... We couldn't afford a dog.
Why is it so easy to bully an orphan? What are they gonna do, tell their mum?
Why are orphans terrible at baseball? They never get home runs.
Why can't orphans play baseball? Because they don't know where home is.
Why do orphans become hookers?
They can call someone daddy.
Why did the orphan become a prostitute?
Because they needed someone to call "daddy".
Orphan boy: "Your dad is probably disappointed in you. I mean, look at you."
Me: "Well, at least my parents kept me. Where are yours?"
April Fools' joke: Go to an orphanage and say your parents came back.
Why did the orphan want to become a prostitute?
To get a daddy.
Girl playing outside: "Step on a line and you break your mommy's spine." She then steps on a line and her mother keels over screaming.
Girl playing outside: "Step on a crack and you break daddy's back." She steps on a crack the mailman next door then keels over screaming.
The husband starts celebrating, gets in the car, and starts to drive away.
The son comes outside and steps on a crack.
The dad then dies in a car crash.
What did the orphan get for Christmas? Nothing, because his parents ran away.
Double whammy. Orphan jokes are like a kid with cancer; it never gets old. 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣👌👌👌👌👌
I'm like a teddy bear. I don't like to be fucked.
If you're ever bored, beat up an orphan, what are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they can't find home plate.
Why are orphans bad at baseball?
Because they don’t know where home is.
Why can’t orphans play baseball?
It’s because they can’t find home plate.
My childhood tormentor was at school. I walked through so I could get to class.
And then he said, "Hey, you donkey!"
I said, "Thank you, I'm so happy that I'm something, not nothing like you!" And I gave him a pink lollipop. He walked off. And I became popular. Or should I say, Lolli-Popular? Sorry.
How do you make an orphan's hands bleed?
You tell them to clap until their parents come home.
What's your favorite place that orphans can't go to?
Home.