Celebrity jokes

What’s loud, red and goes at 200mph?

Paul Walker’s Porsche.

Michael Jackson and Jeffrey Epstein walk into a bar. But a few minutes later, they would walk out, because you have to be 21+. No room for those two.

What kind of club is every parent afraid of their kid joining?

The Mikey Jackson club.

How do you spell the name of the most dangerous pedophile?

M-I-C-H-A-E-L J-O-S-E-P-H J-A-C-K-S-O-N

Michael Jackson has done something no one has ever done before. I'm not talking about his record sales or tickets sold.

I'm talking about being born a black man and dying a white woman. Incredible!

What was one phrase Michael Jackson said to a boy in his bed? Baby, be mine.

What was Michael Jackson's answer to the parents of the little boys who were left with him when asked why does he do it that way? Tell them that it's human nature.

Paul's favorite car.

A Carrera GT.

What does Michael Jackson get high on? A little crack.

I was swimming in a pool on my vacation when a fan of mine approached me. He said he wanted an autograph and gave me a pen to sign it. I accidentally dropped the pen in the pool. Suddenly, Penaldo came out of NOWHERE and dove to save it. He said he always dives for pens.

What do parents tell little boys to make them behave?

"Be good, or when you're asleep, Michael Jackson will get you!"

What do you get when you cross Bill Cosby and Jeffrey Epstein?

Predator 2.

What’s Michael Jackson’s favorite poker hand?

Jacks and 5.

I told my friend that we should dress up as P. Diddy and Drake for Halloween and ask parents if their kid wants to come over for a sleepover.

In memory of Michael Jackson, Vienna Beef, as well as various places, is introducing the Jackson Dog. A 50 year old sausage between a 9 year old bun.

What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a dead pedophile? Nothing.

Chuck Norris doesn't get sun burns. The sun knows better.

I saw this really old guy with the Hitler stache, so I decided to start beating him up.

It was very weird when a camera crew came out with Harrison Ford and started yelling at me.

What is long that Paul Walker can fit into his mouth? A long black tree.

I wanted to play as Kobe Bryant on my gaming console, but the game kept crashing.

Imagine Michael Jackson having kids? Would they come out Black or white or plastic?