Celebrity jokes
Michael Jackson was on a boat with a bunch of children. The boat captain comes up to him and says, "Michael, we've come into some trouble and the boat is about to sink. We need to get off the boat right now." "But what about the children?" The captain said, "F*** them." Michael Jackson responded, "Is there enough time?"
Why did Michael Jackson get away with it? Because he's a smooth criminal.
Why did Paul Walker cross the road?
He wasn't wearing a seatbelt.
How do you get Wacko Jacko to come inside your shop? Have little boys' pants half off!
Book on Michael Jackson: Issued black; returned white.
Memes
What's in common with Michael Jackson and a phone?
Kids play with both of them.
Q: What was the name of Michael Jackson's last book?
A: The ins and outs of child rearing.
"So I asked a genie if he could grant me this wish. I wished to be like Michael Jackson. The next day, I was in a playground full of little kids."
Why can't Juice Wrld play Black Ops II?
Because he can't handle 6 perks.
Michael Jackson and Tonya Harding got together back in the day for a horse racing venture. Tonya says, "I'll handle the handicapping, you go ride the 3-year-olds."
Your forehead's so big, it makes Kanye's ego small.
Chuck Norris once took down a fence. Maybe you heard of it, the Berlin Wall.
What's the opposite of Christopher Reeves?
Christopher Walken.
I can do a very good Michael Jackson impersonation. I just need a kid who can keep a secret.
What does Michael Jackson ask little boys before going to bed? Are you sleeping?
Why did Michael Jackson dangle his baby out the window?
He was airing his blanket.
When Michael Jackson died, people melted him down into Lego pieces so that little kids could play with him instead.
POV: Someone stole Michael Jackson's baby: "He he stole my bab(y), he he."
What is Michael Jackson's favorite planet? Uranus.
What's white and rhymes with Dre? Eminem.