Cant jokes
Jesse: Do you like my ball?
Mike: Yes, they are very big. I can’t even fit them in my mouth. You bought a new ball, right?
Jesse: No, they do not leave me.
Why can’t orphans have Google Homes?
Because they don’t have a home.
I got a reversible jacket for Christmas, I can't wait to see how it turns out.
Why can't my grandma talk?
Because she's dead.
Why can't Jesus judge gay people?
He got nailed right before he died.
Why can’t orphans have phones?
Because it has a home button!
Why don’t orphans play baseball?
Because they can’t find home.
Why is it ok to hit an orphan?
Because they can't call their parents.
What do you call a can opener that doesn't work?
A can't opener.
What's the difference between sex and gender?
You can't have gender with your sister.
What's the best part about beating up an orphan?
They can't tell their parents.
Why can't dinosaurs talk?
Because they are all dead.
What's George Floyd's newest song?
"I can't breathe."
Why do cantaloupes always get married in the church?
'Cause they can't elope.
I should be ashamed of myself for making all these jokes at the expense of the disabled! After all, they can't even stand up for themselves.
Q: Why can emos wear dog collars at school, but people can't wear hats? WTF school!
How is tightrope walking like getting a blowjob from someone ugly?
If you want to enjoy either, you absolutely can’t look down.
Why can't Americans play chess...
Because they lost 2 towers.
You can’t say “dwarf” anymore; you have to say “little people”.
You can’t say “fat”; you have to say “plus size”.
You can’t say “retard”; you have to say “democrat”.
What's the difference between jam and jelly?
You can't jelly your cock into a girl's mouth.