Cant jokes
Why can’t orphans play baseball?
They can’t get to home run!
Why can’t Michael Jackson win a race?
Because he’s always coming in a lil’ behind.
Madden, because tissue, I weep Tears like rivers, cascading deep In this world, so full of strife I find solace in this fragile life.
Oh tissue, tender and so pure, Absorbing pain, a whispered cure. Each tear that falls, you gently hold, A conduit for the stories untold.
In the quiet moments, I confide In your embrace, I can't hide The weight of sorrow, the burden's strain You're there, a balm for every pain.
But madden, oh how you disrupt, In your chaos, emotions erupt. You twist and tangle, hearts collide, Leaving us lost, unable to decide.
Yet even in your tangled mess, You bring forth growth, a rare finesse, For in the madness, we find our way To stand tall, facing a brand-new day.
So madden, meet tissue, ever entwined, In this dance of emotions, our souls aligned. Through tears and anger, joy and fears, We find strength, as life perseveres.
Short and sweet, this tale of strife, Unraveling souls, seeking life. Madden, because tissue, we may be, But we'll rise above, forever free.
Why can’t you have a proper conversation with a gay person?
They’re never straight with you.
Why can't an emo person be in charge of sky diving?
He won't deploy the parachute.
Why can't dinosaurs clap?
'Cause they're dead.
Most of the people here: That's not funny, lots of people died.
Bruh, why are you in here if you can't take a joke?
Why can't dinosaurs clap?
Because they're dead.
Why can't orphans play games?
Parents signed.
Why don't butts get along?
Because they can't stand each other's cheek!
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they don't know where the home plate is.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They can't run home.
Why can’t orphans go on school field trips?
[Parent’s signature: __________]
Why can't orphans work at S. C. Johnson? Because it's a family company.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they can't reach home.
A millionaire LOVES alligators and filled his pool full of alligators. One night he has a party and says, "Whoever can swim from one end to the other of the alligator infested pool unharmed will get a prize, my daughter or a million dollars." Some people line up but they are hesitant. One man gets in the water, swims from one end to the other unharmed, and went to the millionaire. The millionaire says, "Wow, I can't believe you did it! So what's your prize?" The guy says, "I don't care about the million dollars or your daughter, I just want to know who the b@$*ard was that pushed me in the pool!"
Why can’t orphans order from Costa?
They need a parent or guardian with them.
What did the plane say to the towers: "Can't go over it, can't go under it, oh no, we got to go through it."
I asked my North Korean friend, "what's it like to live in North Korea?" He responded, "can't complain."
Why can't lesbians wear makeup while on a diet?
Because they can't eat Jenny Craig while Mary Kay is sitting on their face.