Candy

Candy jokes

Vampire

I killed 5 zombies and stabbed a vampire with a steak, and then I started to wonder why they were carrying bags of candy.

Stripper

How do men like their women? Striped.

How does a priest like their children? Clean.

Why are most orphans strippers? They want to call someone mommy or daddy.

What is the difference between a stripper and candy? None. But they like it when you take the wrapper off.

Jesus

Guy: Why can't Jesus have M&M's?

Priest: Why?

Guy: Because they'll fall through the hole in his hands.

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  • Memes

    Kid

    Follow for candy, kids.

    Like for pizza, kids.

    Comment for kids.

    Pinata

    Today I was asked what I wanted to be, and I said I wanted to be a pinata because I want to be hanged.

    Orphan

    Do you know what is good about being an orphan?

    Every candy bar is family sized.

    Mom

    When you ask your mom for candy but you grab from the wrong drawer...

    Time

    What is a paedo's favourite time of year?

    Halloween because they get free delivery.

    Jesus

    Why can't Jesus eat M&Ms?

    Because they keep falling through the holes in his hands.

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