Can jokes
Why crack your fingers when you can finger your crack?
Yo momma decided to go to KFC until she realized she had to share with her family, so she bought ten buckets and the cashier said, "Here is the receipt." Now yo momma got afraid of how much money she had to spend, despiting on how she spent more than Drake's net worth that he can even lend. She went back home seeing her family looking at her and the KFC, thinking that could be her rent, but the whole family dug into the food. By the second they see the plates empty and seeing the lazy mom steady, she ate so much she wasn't ready until she fell, which caused an earthquake, which made her go to jail, which caused her to be scary.
Q: What's an orphan's favorite game?
A: The Sims 4, because then they can simulate having a family.
Using modern day technology you can produce music with a Tesla coil. I don't know if you heard it, but it is quite shocking and even electrifying. I can't tell if it is metal or techno, but it is more valuable than joules. It really amps up your blood pressure and has you saying watt the whole time. It is way better than current music.
How do you find a redneck virgin?
Just look for a 4-year-old. They can run faster than her brothers.
Why can lesbians not drive cars?
They always strap the wrong thing on.
What do you call a German that can not see?
A Not-see.
What does a blind man crying and an unplugged TV have in common?
Nothing can be seen when they get turned on.
Okay, is this the new thing, saying "Gwen" in your "joke," then people will comment and you can make more friends? If so, then I really need to be saying "Gwen" more in my "jokes or chats."
What does it mean if you can remember a girl's eye color?
She had small tits.
A donut is not empty inside, that was a hole in the middle. If I'm a donut, the hole used to be where I put my feeling and happiness, but people snatch it away from me.
Anyway, can someone put a hole in my physical body too? I kinda wanted to see people cry for me just like how people cry for Ace from One Piece.
(True story)
One day Sally's mom said, "I can just eat you up!" And Sally says, "No, you can't!" Then the mom asks why and Sally says, "Because I'm a beaner, and we don't taste good."
What's the difference between Arsenal and West Ham?
Arsenal can win trophies and win games.
What do you call a school bus that you cannot drive?
A friend.
Why does every emo kid try to be like Tarzan? So they can swing on the vine.
Where can you find the most dads?
Milk Island.
Riddle: I can fill a room, others can have me, but I can't be shared. What am I?
Answer: Loneliness.
How many animals can jump higher than a skyscraper? -- All of them, skyscrapers can't jump.
Can I tell you a cat joke?
Yes, 'cause it's purr-fect.
Why can't an orphan be a bully? Because they don't have parents.