Came jokes

Little Johnny came running into the house and asked, “Mommy, can little girls have babies?”

“No,” said his mom, “Of course not.”

Little Johnny then ran back outside and his mom heard him yell to his friends, “It’s okay! We can play that game!”

I came on for an orphan joke.

Then I realized they are a joke.

You know they say, when you get lemons make lemonade... Well, I took that a little bit too literal.

Turns out squeezing your wife's tits as hard as you can hurts them.

But at least lemonade came out!

Bro, are you an Oompa Loompa? Because you look like you just came from the chocolate factory.

I've recently been treated with Asthma and have been prescribed penicillin. One day I was taking it and a man screaming "SUIII" came into the room and stole it! He thought the penicillin would give him penalties. I couldn't breathe, shame on you Penaldo for ruining my life!

Your mom is so fat, when she swam in the sea, Wales came up to her and said, "We are family, even now you’re fatter than me."

What's an orphan's favorite toy?

A boomerang because it actually came back.

I broke up with my emo girlfriend yesterday, look who came crawling back!

How many emos does it take to fix a light?

I don't know because they never came down.

Have you ever wondered why orphans hate milk?

'Cause their dad never came back with it.

Why did the question come to life? Answer: The adding, subtracting, times, dividing by, and equals signs came to life and squished pages.

One day I asked my mom where kids came from. She said the man who went to the milk store.

Five years later, he came back and left again.

I was walking home, then I saw a "Wait" sign. A man came and took me. I'm still waiting for him to ask for a lesson.

Hi guys, I'm back! So I have a question for you. What is red and smells like blue paint? Type in comments what you came up with.

Why did the orphan scream "wolf"? Because people actually came back.

My girlfriend broke up with me, so I took her wheelchair. Guess who came crawling back?

One day I was going home, and 7 married men came to me and said, "You should be proud of your sister." I asked why. They told me it was the best that they ever had, and we got your sister a trophy.

So I went home, my sister said, "Look at my trophy I earned." The trophy said "The Best Blow Jobs." As a bro, I couldn’t be more prouder.

There were three Indians that got kicked out of the tribe.

One said, "Me find food," and he came back with a decent size rabbit. The other two asked him what happened. He said, "Me see rabbit, me shoot rabbit, and rabbit fall down dead."

The 2nd Indian, "Me find food." He came back with a good sized deer. The other two asked him what happened. He said, "Me see deer, me shoot deer, deer fall down dead."

The third Indian said, "Me find food." He came back crawling, missing a leg and an arm, and he was all cut up. The others asked what happened. He said, "Me see train, me shoot train, train no stop!"

Why was 10 scared?

Because 9/11 came flying in.

As a son, I set up a home date with my mom and my friend because I was going out of town. I set it up by telling my friend that my mom thinks he is cute, and I told my mom that my friend thinks that she is hot.

I came home the next day. I see in the living room my friend giving it to my mom doggy style. I ask what's going on. My mom said to me, "Meet your new daddy," then my friend said, "Hey son, get me a beer from the fridge."