Call jokes
Why can't orphans be gay?
Because no one will call them daddy.
What do you call it when you rickroll someone in the LGBTQ?
You just got fruit-rolled.
What do you call a woman who aborted her quadruplets? A graveyard.
If it’s called the “living room,” why did my grandma die there?
I prank called someone saying, "SON! IT'S ME, SON! I'M COMING FOR YOU!!!" My friend next to me asked who I was calling, and I said, "the orphanage."
Memes
Call me a bad economy with high interest rates and low spending, 'cause I'm in a great depression.
What do you call a funny mountain?
Hill-arious.
What do you call a clever clock?
Clockwise.
What do you call a prostitute with no arms or legs?
Cash and carry.
What do you call a ghost bee?
Boobees.
What do you call a fat transgender midget?
Jigglypuff.
Me: Hey, how are you?
Depression: I'm doing fine. We are just looking for a home :3
Insomnia: Mommy, can we get a home?
Anxiety: Insomnia, wait for mommy to finish.
Depression: Anyway, here is my resume!
Me: Okie, thank you. Ok... mhmmm... WOW! Okie, this is a nice resume! (Didn't Read it...)
Depression: Also, I have two more friends that want to move in too!
Me: Ok, and their names?
Depression: Their names are: PTSD and Trauma!
Me: Ok, they seem fine (Doesn't know about them)
Depression: Okie, here is the money (a penny :(). Thank you, we will call you if we need anything.
Me: Ok, see you soon! :3
Me now hates my life. :)
The Annoying Orange called Donald Trump a copycat.
What do you call a steak that tastes bad?
A MISsteak.
Two hunters are in the woods when one of them collapses. He's not breathing and his gaze is blank. The other hunter grabs his phone and calls emergency services: "My friend is dead! What do I do?"
The emergency dispatcher replies: "Calm down. I can help you. First, make sure he's really dead."
Silence on the other end, then a gunshot. Back on the phone, the hunter asks: "Okay, now what?"
What do you call a homeless bounty hunter?
Hobo Fett!
What do you call a disabled person in a sauna?
Steamed veggies!
What do you call a Black person going down a waterslide? Sewage.
What do you call suicidal Hitler?
Slitler.
Q: What do you call a pigeon that is full of poop that flies in front of a car?
A: A suicide bomber.