Call

Call jokes

Monster

What do you call a retarded three legged doggo heckin pupper monster? A 1996 Dodge Neon with a broken tail light cover and 166,748.46 miles on the odometer.

It could use a tune up and it needs a new transmission soon. New rear tires and a new radiator. Test drives with cash in hand. HMU motivated seller. Don’t waste my time and no lowballs.

Child Support

Son, why do I not have an Easter basket?

Mom, you're 23, you don't need one. Ends calls, child support.

God

The Egyptian god of sun's name is Ka.

My friend: Where does the sun god go to get a shoe?

Me: In a Ka-boot sale :D

Friend: What would happen when someone stole the shoe?

Me: Call The Police Ka!!!

Fat

You're so fat, when someone calls you fat, you get depressed and cut you a slice of cake.

Orphan

Why do orphans not play Call of Duty?

Because they have to land at houses.

Party Pooper

I called my sister a party pooper after she came to my party uninvited.

Grampa said that the only ones who poop at parties are the ones who don't get invited.

So I guess that means I was the party pooper at my own birthday?