Call jokes
Imagine getting a call and it says, "Welcome to David's orphanage. You make them, we take them. How may we help you?"
Principal: You're being bad. I'm gonna need to call your parents!
Orphan: *sits there sadly*
What do you call a black man on the moon?
An astronaut, you fucking racist.
I saw some toilet paper rolls rolling in the wind.
So I called, "Toilet Papers Rolling In!"
What do you call a trash bin for 9/11?
Osama Bin Laden.
What do you call an emo cancer kid?
Chemo.
Your classmate: You're so ugly.
Me: That's what your mom said when she had you and called you a mistake.
Q. Who do you call when a baby with anencephaly is born? A. The funeral home.
What do you call a mouse that doesn't like being known about?
Anonymouse.
What do you call someone that illegally transports cups? - A s-mug-gler.
My friend was in a wheelchair, so I rolled him in fire. Now I call him Hot Wheels.
What do you call two transgender midgets having sex?
A microtransaction.
⚠️I’m not racist it’s just a joke⚠️
What do you call four black ppl in a sleeping bag?
A Kit Kat
What do you call an orphan family photo?
A selfie.
The teacher said she made the kids guess what a random word was, and it was honey. She also gave them a sample of honey to make it a little easier.
Teacher said that it was something that you eat and what parents call each other. Little Johnny said, "I know what it is now! Spit them out now guys, their Buttholes!"
What do you call the White House when a woman becomes President? A stable.
What do you call a rejected guitarist who now lives on the beach?
A sea minor.
POV: An Asian kidnapper kidnapped an Asian kid, and the kidnapper called the kid's mom. Then the mom said, "No, it's fine, my kid got a B, he failed." And the kidnapper let him go saying he doesn't need a failure.
What do you call it when the Edmonton Oilers play against the Nashville Predators? A Diddy Bowl.
I tried phone sex once, lost my bits to a stray "call waiting" beep. Very painful. Never again.