Call jokes
I live in China and we have no food. We have to eat Chinese food, so I called my dog over.
Salman Rushdie got a new book out.
It's called "Buddha. You Fat Cunt."
What do you call a baby kangaroo? Joey.
What do you call a 6 year old named Joey? Supper.
It isn't a real charity until India opens call centers, like they did with Africa.
What do you call it when a lizard can’t get a boner?
Ereptile Dysfunction!
Memes
What do you call a Mexican midget?
A paragraph, because he's not a full essay.
Why does Kurt Cobain hate his brother?
Because he's always calling shotgun.
What do you call it when you get away with masturbating in the shower?
You got off clean.
What do you call a group of black people?
A hoodie.
What do you call a bunch of Aboriginals rolling down a hill?
Abo-lanche.
What do you call a goat?
A goat.
What do you call Stephen Hawking on his period?
Mario Kart.
Papyrus: You are so lazy, Sans!
Sans: Call me what you want. I got THICK SKIN!
Papyrus: Another bad joke and I'm finished with him!!
Frisk: HAHAHA
Papyrus: We are monsters. The awfulest kind!
Sans: To mess with us takes a lot of SPINE!!!
What was Morgan Freeman called before the Civil War?
Morgan.
What do you call a girl skeleton dancing?
A bone-étit.
What do you call an orphan family photo?
A selfi.
My impression of Michael Jackson's butler:
When answering the phone: "No, sorry, he's dead." *hangs up phone*
What do you call lesbian twins?
Lick-A-Likes.
What do you call a skeleton snake?
A rattler!
What do you call an alligator that reads maps? Navigator.