Call jokes
I call my girlfriend .05 because she's a bag I blow into when I've had a few drinks.
What are a pedophile"s shoes called?
Answer: WHITE VANS
How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall?
Depends how hard you throw them.
Q. What do you call a gun that rapes someone?
A. An assault rifle.
I was out for dinner with my 19 year old girlfriend. I, being 42, had many people shouting at me, scolding me, calling me a creep. It really ruined our 10th anniversary.
My friend had a drink called Quick Start, so I said, "That's a quick start to the morning!"
What do you call two Mexicans in a sleeping bag?
A Twix.
A young boy enters a barber shop, and the barber whispers to his customer, "This is the dumbest kid in the world. Watch while I prove it to you."
The barber puts a dollar bill in one hand and two quarters in the other, then calls the boy over and asks, "Which do you want, son?" The boy takes the quarters and leaves.
"What did I tell you?" said the barber. "That kid never learns!"
Later, when the customer leaves, he sees the same young boy coming out of the ice cream parlor.
"Hey, son! May I ask you a question? Why did you take the quarters instead of the dollar bill?"
The boy licked his cone and replied:
"Because the day I take the dollar the game is over!"
One day Johnae said, "What do you call a family outing?"
"Incest."
Low key Johnae fucks Kirby and Peach.
What do you call a kid watching Star Wars by themselves?
Hans Solo.
What do you call a crazy computer?
Wired.
I hate people who get offended here, like seriously, it's called dark humor for a reason.
What do you call milk that gets everything she wants?
Spoiled milk.
What do you call a Down syndrome kid who has been physically abused by older teenagers and her parents for a total of 16 years and has red marks all over their body?
Not funny because Down syndrome jokes aren't funny ;)
A 60 year old man said his wife called him a paedophile the other day, strong words for a 6 year old.
What do you call J Cow's new hit? Deja Moo!
101 pedo jokes.
Why's everything x2, need to get this shit dick off before the coppers come, it's called women taking advantage, you'll shit the bitcoin, 90% percent of pedo's who don't admit they're like kids blame the police, shit your kappas, you only want my veins why don't you inject me with smack, run in with ya black armbands, I've been sized for a million pound, stop giving me strain asking questions, I know what's going to happen next, bet the judge is a women, jealous coz your drink tastes like shit?
Is it coz your shit though? How many bids have you done? Shit 1 million views, don't try bribe me, did the police give me snip? How's my barbie doll or shall I say my little pony? The police beat fuck outta me, what's all these needle marks on my arm, I can tell you want something, why's everything like one big cycle, police own the dark web.
Keep it going on lol.
We should enjoy the present while it's here. Do you know why they call it the present? Because it's a gift.
What do you call someone that looks like Stephen Hawkins and is a space head? Byron Davey.
Anyone know how to get an A on the "An Inspector Calls" section of the GCSE paper?