What do you call a pie made by an octopus? Octopie.
Call Jokes
What do you call all down syndromes?
Twins.
Who do you call someone that steals his brother's girlfriend and [is] disowned by his whole family? Brandon.
Why are priests called father? Because it's too suspicious to call them daddy.
One day a skeleton never worked. Everyone called him lazybones.
What do you call a magic owl?
HOOdini
A father and three sons are renovating a house when a wall of that house collapses and breaks the father's back. Keeping calm, he tells the sons, "Well, I guess this is what you would call back-breaking labor." He chuckled, then passed out from pain.
What do you call a dog magician?
Labracadabrador!
What do you call a bad "egg" meme?
Deep fried!
What do you call a blonde?
A piss-head.
My brother once froze a dollar in a block of ice. I called it "cold hard cash."
What would you call the Eiffel Tower if it falls over? The I Fell Tower!
What do you call a moose that doesn't want to be known? Anonymoose.
What do you call someone with a rubber toe?
Roberto.
What do you call German Music in Spanish? Españodelling.
Trump and two of his friends are stranded on an island with no internet connection and no way of getting home.
As they frantically run around the island trying to get a signal so Trump can call his private helicopter to come and pick them up, Trump's wig falls off and lands on a magical lamp, from which suddenly appears a genie.
As Trump replaces his wig, the genie announces that he will grant each man one wish for freeing him. The men stop to confer. The first one says he will wish for a plane to rescue him, the second wishes for a boat to rescue him, and they tell Trump to wish for a helicopter to rescue him.
Trump, being Trump, nods and says yes, but he wasn't really listening. Then they approach the genie. The first one of Trump's friends wishes for a plane to rescue him, as agreed. The second one of Trump's friends wishes for a boat to rescue him, as agreed. Then Trump is left all alone, but instead of wishing for a helicopter to rescue him, as agreed, he says, "Aww, I'm lonely now. I wish both my friends were here with me!"
My girlfriend called me a pedophile... That's a big word for a 1st grader.
One day Nathan came in ten minutes late to Mr. Jones's class. Mr. Jones asked him, "Nathan, what do you have to say for yourself?" Nathan says, "Please sir, I was on top of Cherry Hill." Then Dave came in a further ten minutes late to Mr. Jones's class. Mr. Jones asked him, "Dave, what do you have to say for yourself?" Dave says, "Please sir, I was on top of Cherry Hill." Then Mike came in a further ten minutes late to Mr. Jones's class. Mr. Jones asked him, "Mike, what do you have to say for yourself?" Mike says, "Please sir, I was on top of Cherry Hill." Then five minutes later a new girl walked in to Mr. Jones's lesson. Mr. Jones is at the end of his tether now and says, "Who are you and why are you late?" The new girl says, "Sir, I'm called Cherry Hill."
What do you call an Indian lesbian? Minge-eater.
What do you call a convict in prison for touching little girls? A boy named Brandon.
