Call jokes
Why can’t an orphan be gay?
Because they have no one to call “daddy.”
What's the special part of town called? Downtown.
What do you call being run over by Michael Jackson?
Being hit by... Being struck by... A smooth criminal.
What do you call an orphan that sings a solo?
What do you call a bee that produces milk? Booby.
What do you call a door that's a man? A door, man.
What is the part of school with all the autistic people called? Downtown.
What do you call an emo strip club?
Suicidal Thots.
Why don't orphans care if they get in trouble? They can't call their parents.
You know why they call her Wonder Woman?
She's always wondering where she parked her invisible jet.
I went to the local butcher's and asked him what happened to his Saturday boy. The butcher replies, "I had to fire him, I found him with his dick in the meat slicer!"
"What did you do with the meat slicer?" I asked.
The butcher says, "I had to fire her too!"
Alternative punchline:
"I had to call social services, she was only 14."
What do you call an Indian gravedigger?
Digdeep.
What do you call a Turk eating turkey?
A cannibal.
I called my sister a party pooper after she came to my party uninvited.
Grampa said that the only ones who poop at parties are the ones who don't get invited.
So I guess that means I was the party pooper at my own birthday?
Alright, so I have a few orphan jokes. I'm gonna put them all in one message.
Why can't orphans be gay? They have no one to call "daddy."
Why can't orphans go on a field trip? Parent signature: ______
New teacher: I used to be an orphan as a kid. Students: hahaha Teacher: Is anyone missing? Students: No one, just your parents.
Why did the orphan become a prostitute? They kept calling everyone "daddy."
Why do orphans have the iPhoneX? Because it has no home button.
You: What do you call a door knob without the lock?
Me: I don't know.
You: Are you sure?
Me: I don't know.
You: Okay.
What do you call a funny chicken?
A comedi-hen!
What do you call a tree?
A treeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
I asked a girl I met if I could take her out to dinner.
The joke is I knew right after she said, "I'll call you," she was lying to me, not surprised even a little.
The next joke was a part of me hoped she would call, but did I really think she was going to? I'll never be good enough for anyone, what was I thinking, why did I even bother to ask her in the first place? I think it was just to prove I was right, I'm unwanted.
LONELINESS EQUALS SADNESS.
Why are blinds called blinds?
Because when they aren’t closed, they are blinding!