Yo mama so fat, when they buried her, they named her Everest. Mount Everest.
Q where do you bury the people killed in 9/11
A its already done for you
I've been looking for my parents for years. For the life of me I can't remember where I buried them
(found on web) There was an American wrestler from Texas named John, who throughout his high school career had never lost a match. As he went on into college he continued undefeated. He became a national icon and symbol of American strength.
News began to circulate of a Russian wrestler who was fierce and unstoppable. As each wrestlers legends grew, a match was set up between the two, America versus Russia. The match would be held in Texas.
John began training immediately. Every day his coach would tell him, “This Russian has a move called the Mongolian Death Grip. No one has ever escaped the Mongolian Death Grip. DO NOT let him get you in the Mongolian Death Grip”
The day of the match finally came. Just before each wrestler stepped onto the mat in front of the capacity crowd, the coach once again said, “Whatever you do, do not let him get you in the Mongolian death grip. No one has ever escaped the Mongolian death grip”.
Four seconds into the match, the Russian had the American in the Mongolian death grip. The coach buried his face into his hands and cursed John for not listening to his advice. All of the sudden he heard the crowd irrupt in a chant of USA USA USA. He looked up and saw the Russian pinned by John. The coach ran out to meet John and embarrassingly told him, “I didn’t see... Once he had you in the Mongolian Death Grip I looked away. How in the world did you get out of the Mongolian death grip?”
With heavy breath, John told him “Well coach, that Russian grabbed me and twisted my body in ways I never imagined possible. I was wincing in pain when I open my eyes and right in front of me were two testicles. So I bit them.”
“What???” Said the coach... “John I don’t think that is legal. You could be disqualified”
“I don’t know about that coach. But I can tell you one thing. You ain’t got no idea how strong you are until you bite your own balls”
When my Uncle Frank died, he wanted his cremations to be buried in his favorite beer mug. His last wish was to be Frank in Stein.
Why do eight year old girls wear panties with flowers on? In loving memory of all the faces that were buried in there
Who is buried in the tomb of Alexander the Grape?
Alexander the raisin.
I finally got my wife to shut up.Who knew all I had to do was bury her alive all these years ha! try telling me to get my feet off the couch now karen!
Yo mama so ugly just after she was born, her mother said "What a treasure!" and her father said, "Yes, let's go bury it."
My dad drove past a graveyard he said “I won’t be buried there.” I asked why. He said “Because I am not dead yet”
Where was Stephan hawking buried
In a black hole 😂😂
Some people are such "treasures" that you just want to bury them
Why did the rapper bring a shovel to the concert?
Because he was about to BURY the COMPETITION
Yo mama so fat when she got buried it toke them all the trees on earth for her coffin
Your mama is so stupid, her phone died so she buried it in the backyard!
A Chinese boy never met his parents after they were killed in WW2, so when he learned where they were buried he quickly rushed there.
He sat down in front of their graves and prayed "I want to see your face again mommy...". A miracle happened, his mother rose up from the graves and hugged him.
The boy cried then said "I want to see you too dad". He looked at his father's grave but nothing happened
Suddenly a Japanese soldier came up behind him and asked "were you looking for me?"
i love my family when there buried alive
My marriage was on the rocks so I buried my wife under some.
*Breaking News!* - Apparently the first person in Melbourne has died because of the Coronavirus. In his house they found 1000 cans of food, 50 kilos of pasta, 80 kilos of rice, 300 toilet rolls and 50L of hand sanitiser which he had panic purchased from the supermarket and stock piled "just in case".
The whole lot collapsed and buried him.
