Blonde jokes

What did the blonde say when I told a rape joke?

"Can you show me what rape is?"

Two blonde girls find a beautiful Christmas tree in the woods.

After two hours, someone said, "We found a tree without bark!"

How To Kill A Blonde 101:

First Step: Get a pool.

Second Step: Put a scratch-and-sniff at the bottom.

What do you call someone who’s blond, beautiful, and listens to what you’re saying, but only hears what they want?

Womxn

What's the difference between a blonde and your computer?

You don't want your computer to go down on you.

What do you do when a blonde throws a grenade at you?

Pull the pin and throw it back.

How does a blonde punish her blind son? She takes away his TV privileges.

How does a blonde punish her deaf son? She takes away his telephone privileges.

How does a blonde punish her paraplegic son? She gives him a spanking.

A blonde went to an HIV test. When she came back, she said, “The doctors say that I’m all positive!”

What’s red, blonde, and wet?

Saskia in grain.

Why can't blondes make ice?

They forgot the recipe.

Blondes like their men how they like their rice: brown, 500 at a time, and all in her bowl.

If a gay white male with blond hair is a prostitute, you will get $175.00 back for a blowjob if you give him $20.00. If you give a can of sauerkraut to a gay white male that is a prostitute with blonde hair and who is also Polish, you will get the money back that he paid for the can of sauerkraut if you wanted him to give you a blowjob. And if you wanted a blowjob from a gay white male that is a prostitute that is Canadian and Polish with blond hair, you will get the money back he paid for the bottle of maple syrup at the grocery store if you wanted him to give you a blowjob. But if you wanted to fuck him up the ass, he will give you the money back that he paid for the can of Crisco and he will also give you the money back that he paid for the box of condoms and he will give you the change back that he paid for the box of tampons that he paid for his baby sister or you could get a free anonymous blowjob at an adult book store.