Bigness jokes
How many babies does it take to paint a wall?
Depends on how big they are and how hard you throw them.
Why do ballerinas wear tutus?
The one-ones are too small and the three-threes are too big.
What’s big, red, and eats rocks?
A big, red, rock eater.
Why do mermaids wear seashells?
They are too big for “B” shells, and too small for “D” shells.
A very rich and famous comedian walked into a Russian bar and asked for a vodka, but the bar man (a big fan of his) answered to him: - "This vodka isn't good enough for you." - "If it is good enough for you it is good enough for me!"
Bigfoot is just a normal person who covered himself in Pritt Stick and went down on Susan Boyle.
My girlfriend keeps calling me a pedophile. That's a big word for a seven year old.
Man's got that big bati, you know.
Why is Santa's sack so big?
He only comes once a year.
What is the best thing about living in Switzerland? -- Well, the flag is a big plus.
Two windmills are standing in a field and one asks the other, "What kind of music do you like?" The other says, "I'm a big metal fan."
I believe a lot of conflict in the Wild West could have been avoided completely if cowboy architects had just made their towns big enough for everyone...
Yo mama stops at the PokeStop... to buy a Big Mac.
What do Pink Floyd and Princess Diana have in common?
Their last big hit was the wall.
What's big, green, has four legs, and if it falls out of a tree, it can kill you?
A pool table.