what's better than having unprotected sex? getting an abortion.
why is it better to date an orphan...
their parents are never home
What can a gay man with a physical disability do better than a heterosexual woman that doesn't have a physical disability? suck a big cock.
How can you tell that a woman cannot fit through a vent because she got pregnant from a baby elephant ain't no telling who" in better shape the elephant or the woman i guess it's probably weight watchers.
Have you heard the gossip about the butter? Oh I guess I better not spread it.
I am like currency, people always trade me out for someone better
what number is better than 69? 88 cause you get ate twice.
Q: why did the chicken cross the road? A: because chickens are mindless creatures and does not know any better?
Jackie gives better head than Marilyn.
The Trump family are flying from New York to DC when Donald looks down on the cities below
Trump: I think I’ll throw a $1000 bill out the window and make some American happy Melania: Oh honey, why not throw ten $100 bills out the window and make ten Americans happy? Ivanka: Even better daddy, throw 100 ten dollar bills out the window and make 100 people happy Pilot: Why don’t you all jump out the window and make the whole country happy?
I went to see my grandfather in the hospital because I Wanted to get to know him better before he passed, maybe take a selfie with him. But when I got there my phone died so I unplugged a vacuum to plug in my phone, and it turns out he only knows Spanish so When he kept saying "Me desconectaste el soporte de mi vida." I thought he wanted water, but when I got back with the water he was asleep and now my phone was charged so I translated what he said. And it was "You unplugged my life support", that's when I called the doctor...
Good news is, I got one sick selfie!
Life is better without my dad annoying me(him smacking me,screaming for something useless, limiting my screen time, and much more
even the world trade center underwent a better upgrade than your ugly ass
Me: Hey god are you there" it's me Michael "god":*SILENCE* Me: If any gods exist they better say or do something this instant. "god": *SILENCE*
You are so blind even a spider can see better than you
What’s better than Ted Danson? Ted singing and Danson!
FE FI FOUNG BETTER RUN AND HIDE:COVIID (really
Is your oven running?? Then u better go catch it
U better get used to having dry ceral cuz ur dad aint never bringing the milk back.
I did a walk today but it was so much better and a walk home 🏠I had dinner 🍴 night was good fun at home 🏡 night was good night night I was a little off but you were so fun to be a night
