Being jokes
Yo mama so fat, when she stepped on the scale it said, "To Be Continued."
He sings, he dances, be he also HE HE.
I was beefing with a dude in a wheelchair, so I took his wheelchair and threw it across the street and told him, "Walk it off, you will be fine."
What's blue and bad for your teeth?
A green brick that's painted blue after the original paint dries (it takes a little while to dry), but after it dries you can paint it and then it will be green. If the brick is green it is called a green brick as it is green (not blue anymore) and it hurts your teeth because brick is a hard material that can damage the bones in your mouth (also known as your teeth).
All rape can be prevented. It's just a matter of semantics.
Why can't religious women be raped? Because they are taught to never say no!
Who wants to be my boyfriend, please?
Women should be allowed to choose: dishes or cooking first.
Why did the orphan commit a crime?
Because they wanted to be wanted!
Why can't orphans be in charge of making web pages?
Because they can't add a home page.
What happens when you fail to be an emo? You don't make the cut.
Dad: Here you go son, all your toys have gone to the orphanage.
Son: Why, Dad?
Dad: You would be bored there if there was not anything to do.
You could think that some orphans are gay.
But think, would they be home-osexual? 🤷🏼♀️🤷🏼♀️🤷🏼♀️
Lucifer is caged by Jesus, cuz he got tired of being alone on a pedestal.
I am going to be a ghost for Halloween. I actually want to be a ghost every day, because at least I'd be dead.
Imagine being autistic idiots.
If I had a dollar for every time you said something smart, I'd be broke.
What do genders and the Twin Towers have in common?
There used to be two, now it’s a sensitive subject.
My two moods are “I can’t believe I get to be a person” and “I can’t believe I have to be a person.”
I'm going to start taking confetti with me to therapy so when my therapist asks me, "How are you?" I can say "sad" and toss the confetti everywhere. It'll be like a real-life iMessage!