Behavior jokes
If your sisert makes you 100% mad, slap your siert.
I got pranked so many times. Once I saw two wheels rolling down the street. I heard this noise. I looked behind me. There's a legless man in a wheelless chair screaming, "HELP! I CAN'T GO ANYWHERE!" but I walked away. I knew it was a prank.
I walk in from work to find my wife dead on the sofa.
As I unzip for one last ride, she says, "BOO!" What kind of sick fuck does that?
"I only eat food on the right of my plate."
"Are you good at eating?"
"I'm alright at eating."
Me: Hey Jim!
Jim: I'm now a cannibal.
Me: WAIT, JIM! N-
What does an emo kid and an apple have in common?
They both are hanging.
Is it just me, or is it normal to you when people scream?
If you're ever frustrated, just punch them in the face. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
A guy walked into a bar.
A guy walked out of a bar.
What do 2 emo kids say to each other?
"I like ya cut, G."
*Slaps wrist*
Why do Inbred White Trash Racists talk so much shit?
Answer: Because deep down inside, they KNOW that they are nothing but PATHETIC LOSERS!
Why does Sally have no friends? Because she is obese.
The more they smile, the less they see.
Here's what to do if an annoying person keeps talking to you. First, ignore them until they ask you if you're going to respond. Then ask them: if they were walking down the street and a rabid dog suddenly started barking at them, would they get on all fours and bark back? After that, continue to ignore them.
Bob, why are you kicking the kids?
What, it's not like they have a home to go to.
"I love all mankind!" said the cannibal.
When you are sitting outside at school and this boy comes up to you with a rock in his hand and says, "Do you know where Mrs. Stewart is at?"
You are all fucking disgusting!
What is the fastest thing in the world?
James Charles when he sees little boys.
I’m enyaw and I fancy my PE teacher. She is called Kelly Pearce and I go to Beckfoot Oakbank. I always watch her because I am a creep. I live at school under the stairs, but I also try [to] follow her home, and if I'm unsuccessful I look her up on a dodgy website and go on Google maps and look at her door.