B.A.L.L.S. jokes
Dear Slim Shady,
balls.
Balls in your jaws.
Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Because he had no balls to do it.
I have a lot of respect for trans women.
That surgery takes balls!
Ever wondered why my gay kids don't play basketball? Because they can't shoot the ball straight into the hoop.
I kicked a ball into someone. Now I got a red card.
I replaced "Jingle Bells" with "Jiggle Balls"... "Jiggle balls, jiggle balls, jiggle all the way! Oh what fun it is to ride on jiggly balls today!"
Segma says, "32!"
Ligma Says, "And?"
Segma says, "Anding deez balls to your mouth."
So the coach got mad at me because I'm the only one on my team who is only a bit on the spectrum, and I was just keeping the ball to myself. The coach pulled me aside and said, "Pass to others." I said, "Why?" And he said, "There's no 'I' in 'team.'" I said, "Yeah, but there's an 'm' and an 'e.'"
Q: How do you make a pool table laugh?
A: Tickle its balls.
What does one saggy boob say to the other saggy boob?
"If we don’t get some support people will think we are ball sacks..."
What is the world's greatest invention? The ball gag, do you know why? Honestly, officer, I never heard her say no.
A mouse is just like a ball bearing.
Drench them in oil, and they stop squeaking.
Do you know how a dragon is? You don't know who? It's dragging these 2-liter balls across your pathetic face and slamming it into a f*cking dumpster you regret.
My friend threw a soccer ball at a disabled kid.
We all yelled "Rocket league!"
How can you compare a gay prostitute to Pacman?
They both get paid to eat 200 balls!
Two cannibals have just captured a man and are about to eat him, so they cook him and lay him on a table. The first cannibal says, "You start at the bottom, I start at the top," so they both chow down.
About half an hour later, the second cannibal says, "I'm having a ball!" Then the first cannibal says, "Then you're eating too fast!"
Why do midgets laugh when they run?
Because the grass tickles their balls.
What do you call a Russian man with three balls?
'Whodya nikabollokov'
Last week, I was on a plane to Manchester when suddenly the plane was hit by a ball. I wondered where it came from, but I soon realized it was none other than Penaldo practicing his free kicks. Shame on you, Penaldo, for almost killing me!