I'm reading a horror story in Braille. Something bad is about to happen, I can FEEL it
Jill goes home one night with a guy she met at a club. He's tall, super hot, and seems different than most guys she meets. They arrive at his place and head straight to his room. Jill can't help but notice a shelf full of teddy bears. On the bottom are small teddy bears, on the middle are medium-sized teddy bears, and finally, on the top are large teddy bears, all lined up beside each other. She begins to think that he is sentimental and sweet, and isn't afraid to show it. Her heart melts and she want to give him the best night of his life. She gives him a blowjob, and lets him really give it to her, and even takes it in the rear! In the morning, she slowly gets dressed, and smiles at him and asks, "How was that?" He nods and says, "Not too fuckin' bad at all. Help yourself to a prize on the second shelf!"
I'm not completely useless....
I can be used as a bad example!?
Beer Bottle: βYou break me, you get one year of bad luck!β
Mirror: βYou kiddin' me? You break me, then y'all get seven years of bad luck!β
Condom: βHahaha...β
Maybe Leo actually ISNβT stupid... maybe she just has BAD LUCK with thinking
Why was the rapper bad at baseball?
Because he couldn't stop DROPPING HITS
Why did the rapper go to the dentist?
He had a bad case of CAVITY FLOWS
I feel bad for the people who were born on April,1 Their life is a joke
I told my wife i needed a blood transfusion when i could not remember she said be positive to. Bad i am now a ghost wrighting this
A bus full of ugly people is driving down the street. The bus crashes and everyone goes to heaven. They see Saint Peter and he feels bad for them and grants them one wish before they go into heaven. The first one says, "I wish to be attractive." The second one says the same.
Meanwhile, the 3rd person in line is giggling and snickering and laughing while Saint Peter is granting wishes. Curiously, he asks why he is laughing. He says, "I was going to wish that they turned ugly again."
A mirror and a beer bottle are arguing The beer bottle says: if you break me you get one year of bad luck The mirror scoffs: oh, that's nothing, you break me and you get 7 years of bad luck. The condom overhears these arguments and walks off laughing
What separates bad jokes from dad jokes?
Condoms.
Why are women so bad at parking?
Because they've been lied to about what 8 inches look like their whole lives.
