Bad jokes
Jake Paul
What do you call a bad "egg" meme?
Deep fried!
A man walking on his roof, carrying an axe. He drops it on someone below him and says, "Sorry, it was an axe-cident!"
What do you need in order to crash a train?
A bad track record.
What do you get when you cross a cold wind with a feather?
A brrrrrrrr-d!
Why does Adam go hockey, you might ask?
In my opinion, he shouldn't go because he is bad, but he needs the armor to protect himself from his own step-dad.
Déjà Moo: The feeling that you've heard this bull before.
What did one brain cell say to the other brain cell?
"I think I feel a connection!"
What did the comedian say when he walked into a bank?
"This is a stand-up."
They say Chuck Norris's tears cure cancer, too bad he doesn't cry.
Are you an egg, because you crack me up?
I gave my friends some buttons.
Too bad he couldn't pull himself together.
What has a heart but no organs?
A deck of cards!
I'm glad Stephen Hawking died because he was wheely wheely bad.
What has 5 legs, 3 arms, and 7 feet?
The finish line at the marathon bombing.
I stayed up all night trying to follow the sun... Then it dawned on me.
Guys, I'm sorry about these bad puns. I should've kept my big Meowth shut.
A woman has twins and gives them up for adoption. One goes to a family in Egypt and is named "Amal." The other goes to a family in Spain, who name him "Juan." Years later, Juan sends a picture of himself to his mother.
Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal. Her husband responds: "They're twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."
What's grey and can't fly?
A parking lot.
Last night in bed, I was gazing up at the stars and was thinking to myself, "Where the f*ck is my roof?"