Attention jokes
Q: What did the grandma cat say to her grandson when she saw him slouching? A: You need to pay more attention to my pawsture.
Are you suicide? Because you are always on my mind.
Why did Mia Khalifa become so famous?
Because she blew up.
You know I want an ADHD cure.
When?
Squirrel!
I named my daughter Kennedy so when I talked about how her brain was shot out of her head, people just thought I paid really close attention in history.
Dagger. This is to get your attention, for Dagger Jr. and I. We'd like to speak with you, and possibly Lynx, if we can find a time to all talk.
Two terrorists walk into a bar.
The bartender asks what they are talking about. Terrorist 1 says, "We are going to kill 14k people and a donkey."
The Bartender asks, "Why a donkey?"
Then Terrorist 2 says, "See, I told you no one would care about the 14k people."
A man finds his son climbing the roof of his house. The kid kept using all sorts of material to climb up, but the dad didn't pay much attention.
Next day the kid went to the state tower and kept climbing using some adhesive gloves. The dad asks his son for a second time: "Son! Why are you doing this?" The son replies: "You told me to aim up high!"
I dated an Indian girl for about six months. She was always Sikhing attention.
Why is rape worse than death?
Because dead people get way more attention.
Why are people suspicious when a priest yells "Attention Kmart shoppers"?
Boy's pants are half off.
ATTENTION EVERYBODY: I am the owner of this website, and I will be deleting it in 5 hours. Thank you everybody who has participated in this website's life. Goodbye!
Rope: Hey buddy! Want to hang?
Me: Maybe I can hang later...
Cock: Can I have attention from your Dad now?
Hey girl, are you a drill sergeant, because you have my privates' attention.
Hi, I have a question for you.
Did you know that reading this is wasting your time?
Yeah, sorry xD
The patient says, "Doctor, you've got to help me. Nobody ever listens to me. No one ever pays any attention to what I have to say."
The doctor says, "Next, please."
Why are orphans always famous?
Because they say, "Go big or go home," and orphans only have one option.
READ THIS OUT LOUD:
This is this cat.
This is cat.
This is how cat.
This is to cat.
This is keep cat.
This is an cat.
This is idiot cat.
This is a busy cat.
This is for cat.
This is forty cat.
this is seconds cat.
NOW- go back and read the third word from each line from the start.
I have OCD and ADD, so everything has to be perfect... but not for very long.
Why does a straight guy act gay? Because he wants to feel wanted and wants to be BFFs with the hottest girls.