Astronomy jokes
I go to Venus to get a bigger penis.
Yo mama so ugly, it made the world stop spinning.
What do you get when you combine a planet and an apple?
Mario.
Uranus? More like urine is gassy! (Uranus is urine, by the way.)
How do you measure the circumference of Uranus?
By the rings around it.
Saturn was so loved, someone put a ring on him.
The earth is not round.
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Why did the rapper bring a telescope to the studio?
To see his FUTURE in the STARS.
Did you know? The most Black Holes in the Universe are all found in Africa!
Your hairline is so far back, scientists consider it a ninth planet.
Does that neverending forehead of yours go all the way to Mars, holy fucking shit?
Why is NASA so sus?
'Cause they wanted to see Uranus.
What’s the length difference between your hairline and Saturn? Nothing.
You're so black, when you get near the sun, we go into a solar eclipse.
Why did Uranus say gross? Because he saw Uranus.
Uranus is pronounced "ur anus."
Phobos and Deimos are just asteroids in moon costumes, and Mars was blind due to its frequent sandstorms, so it let Phobos and Deimos be its moons.
Why is a moon rock tastier than an Earth rock? It’s a little meteor.
Why is the sun so mean? Because it keeps ROASTING everyone!
I always knew that Maranda Sings was orbiting Uranus.