Ass jokes
What is the sexiest animal alive? The Βυττerfly.
What is gayer than man sex ring?
Not slapping the ass at Hooters.
"Pootin is a pussy won't even fight in the war that he started!"
"Pootin is a pussy and Ukraine is beating Russia's ass!"
What did the poo say to the ass?
"I left you."
Y'all smell like ass!
Jesus saved me from eternal fate, but I didn't want to get saved. I was about to fight Satan on Final Destination before facing and kicking God's ass.
Rot in hell?
More like nasty-ass thot in a well.
Say the drive through at McDonald's, order (don't say the sake) but when you get it ask them, "My sake?" and say, "Sake that ass."
I swear every time I walk past a guy, they stare at my ass. I always keep wondering why it hurts so much.
Don't say you want to eat out a five-year-old's pussy, because I have already shoved a glass dildo in her tight ass pussy, UwU.
The new pandemic is feminism and all kinds of democratic thinking. COVID is a joke compared to these nasty ass diseases.
Your hairline had to "Fahrt" cuz my ass IS your hairline.
What's the last thing to go through a fly's head as it hits a car's windshield at 100 mph?
Its ass.
Her: Eat my ass!
Me: Yes, chef!
What do you call a Gary Dinosaur?
A mega-sore-ass.
Knock knock. Who's there? Ivana. Ivana who? Ivana kick your a**!
Is your ass jealous of the shit that came out of your fucking mouth?
Who can jump the highest? Depressed asses, some say they’re still in the air.
So here’s this funny story, and it’s true.
So my mom has this friend. When this guy was a kid, he was on the school bus, and this Mexican kid checked him into the aisle, so he hits him across the face with a metal lunchbox, and he started bleeding. Then they both get banned from the bus for a few days, so him and his dad drive to the Mexican kids house, and his dad says to the Mexican kids dad “if your kid ever picks on my kid again, I’m gonna come back to this house and kick your ass!”
Roses are red, violets are blue, Your ass is clean because Randy won’t stop liking [it].