Art jokes
Ex Of Johnnys: I have a question.
Johnny: What?
Ex Of Johnnys: Am I pretty?
Johnny: Yes ofc jesus made everybody wonderfully!
Ex: Awhh!
Johnny: But whoever made you was painting Thomas the Train while making your face.
What brand of paint did Michael Jackson use to paint Neverland Ranch?
Dutch Boy.
Why was the emo mad?
The picture got hung, not her.
So I went to a church the other day and I asked my friend, "Is that painting of Jesus and is it through the wall with one with three nails?" Oh wait, I wasn’t even Jesus, he’s not doing the T post that he invented.
It's not a mistake, it's a ✨ masterpiece ✨.
My balls are so purple that I use them as crayons, and I am not talking about the balls you play with. I am talking about the boy balls.
What do you call an orphan's family picture? A self-portrait.
They laughed at my crayon drawing.
So I laughed at their chalk outline.
What do you call an orphan's family portrait?
A self-portrait.
Rachel won the lottery twice in two years. Her friend Jim called her every day asking for tips on winning, just the same. Then one day, simply to get rid of him, Rachel said, "Watch two martial arts movies, eat three pieces of hard beef jerky, and pick a fight at a bar."
Jim replied with a shocked look, "That's what I do after Mr. Tugman shakes my hand too long."
Q: Why did the ballerina get kicked off the stage at the performance?
She was standing way too close to the dancers.
Q: Why did the ballerina get kicked off the squad?
She was standing way too close to the dancers.
I’m a cashier at a grocery store, and when I’m bored, I draw on my hands with a pen. Well, this guy walks up to me and says, “You know, I got mental illnesses from drawing on myself.”
And so, without thinking, I said, “Well, I’ve already got those, so I think I’m fine...” 😳 He looked concerned. Oops lol.
I will never forget my little brother's last words, RIP.
His last words: "Paint doesn't taste good."
What is it called when an art teacher has a heart attack?
An art attack!
Why was the picture in jail? Because it got framed!
What's the difference between Jesus and a picture frame?
It only took one nail to hang the picture frame.
Staring (DYM 119).
"Nananananananannanananananannananananaanan, that's how music goes!"
Who is M.J.'s cartoon character?
Muzan Kibutsuji
Hehe