Hitler was talking about how to fight in WW2 when someone sneezed while Hitler was giving a speech so Hitler yelled WHO SNEEZED ROW 1 DID ANYONE SNEEZE they said no and Hitler shot everybody same for row 2 & 3 but in row 4 someone nervous said me I'm sorry then Hitler said bless you
What do you call an army of disabled people? Special forces
My dad never came back with the milk my mom told me he's in the army
A local bar was so sure that its bartender was the strongest man around, that they offered a standing bet of one thousand dollars that their bartender can squeeze a lemon dry until all the juice ran into a glass, and anyone who could squeeze one more drop of juice out would win the money. Many people had tried but failed. Over time Weight Lifters, Lumberjacks, men in the Army, and Etc. But still, nobody could do it. One day, a scrawny little man came in wearing thick glasses and a cheap suit and said in a tiny squeaky voice, "I'd like to try the bet". After the laughter had died down the bartender said "okay" and he grabbed a lemon and squeezed away. Then he handed the wrinkled remains of the Rhine to the little man. But the crowd's laughter turned to Total silence as the man clenched his fist around the lemon and six drops fell into the glass. As the crowd cheered, the bartender paid the one thousand dollars and asked the little man, "What do you do for a living? Are you a lumberjack a weight lifter or what?". The man simply replied, "I work for the IRS".
Which branch of the military accepts toddlers? The infantry.
If you have emo kid army they'll kill them selves before they get to the field
What is an army members top drink?
WARter
Why does the United States have such a good military? Because they learn to dodge bullets in school.
Why does the army take orphans as fighter jet?
Because homing middles don’t work on them.
stephen hawking cant stand for army
Comments and join dumbledore's army in the community to give someone you hate permanent bad luck
What do you call a Russian rifle that went 1 rank down?
An AK-46.
Q: What do you call 6 gay men in the army
A: Rainbow six seege
How did the Germans conquer Poland so fast? They marched in backwards and the Polish people thought they were leaving.
I once had an emo friend doing a course for the marines. He made the cut.
Jim: My grandpa fought in the army during world war two. He was an officer. Me: Cool, what rank of officer? Jim: SS. Me: ...
Where did the king put his armies?
In his sleevies.
Officer: "Stay back soldiers, minefield!" Soldier: "Let's clear the field!" Officer: "Ok!" *silence*
*explosion*
Why did the Drill Sergeant get in trouble? He got caught playing with his Privates!
What do you call an autistic kid with a gun? Special forces
