Ares jokes
When do you know your dad knows you are sneaking out? He hears the loud creaks.
"Why are all these orphans here?" said Chris.
"Because their dad went to go get the milk," said MrBeast.
3 Years Later,
"I AM GIVING APPLE IN A SHARE TO EVERY ORPHAN IN THE WORLD, AND I'M ALSO GIVING EACH OF THEM 1000000000000 DOLLARS."
Why is the world split in half? Because fat people are weighing the Earth down.
What animal jumps the highest?
An emo kid, some of them are still up there.
Your eyebrows and hairline are so far apart that when Dora the Explorer went and found your hairline and was trying to find your eyebrows, the map couldn't even tell her.
someting you should not send your blind friends
What type of people have the world record for most stories read in the shortest amount of time?
Emos, some of them are still in the air.
Why are orphans good at dodge ball?
No one misses them.
Why are orphans bad at baseball?
Because they never make it home.
"What's the wifi password?"
"121i362"
"It's not working."
"What wifi are you trying to connect to?"
"The United Airline."
"We're in the World Trade Center, though."
Why are Mexicans good at Uno?
They always steal the green card.
I was crying at school because my grandpa died. My friends asked what his last words were. I told them his last words were, "Are you still holding the ladder?"
Why you should never borrow money from dwarves?
Because they are always short! 😁😁😁😁
I know this girl, Kamelah. She say, "What are you looking at?" I said, "I’m just tryna figure out why it look like Santa stole your hairline."
What do girls and your hairline have in common? They are both receding.
I see 2 fighting with 3. "What's going on?" I ask. 5 responds: "The numbers are moving on up."
Your arms are open. They stretch towards me, Reaching, grabbing, pulling me, Surrounding me, Drowning me in my helplessness. Time standing still, inside here. Looking through windows, time passing by. Let me go, will ya?
What do chicken on a plancha and emos have in common?
They both are hung.
My parents created a joke 11 years ago and people are still laughing at it, but I know it's not me because jokes have meaning.
These two guys were texting each other.
Guy 1: How are you?
Guy 2: I’m great. The weather is lovely here. Guy 2: *sends picture of a flying spring*
Guy 1: ???
Guy 2: Springs in the air. :)
Are you a school? 'Cause I wanna shoot kids in you.